Daughter moving out and won’t take her tortoise

[Questionsquestions23]

My daughter got a tortoise when she was 18 - she’s now 22. She’s moving out in September and says she can’t take him. I have done most of the work for him. I get up every morning and forage for healthy greens for him change up his water - I do the same when I get in from work. I prepare him for hibernation, give him a bath a few times a week.

daughter went to uni and looked after him in the holidays but since leaving she works full time so it me.
the tortoise is about 25 so will Probably out live me.
I don’t want this responsibility!
what can I do?

My dad had a tortoise which he'd had for over 50 years (and she was fully grown when he got her - vet reckoned she was at least 80yrs). Anyway after he died, my Mum looked after her for a couple of years then she (mum) went into sheltered housing, which wasn't suitable for the torty , she liked being outside in summer and roaming all over the lawn. So she gave her to a tortoise rescue place, where to my knowledge she still lives very happily with a load of other elderly tortoises.

Do not offer to your local primary school or to any other giveaway group.
Are you on Facebook? There is a well respected tortoise rehoming group on there. You are aware how specialised his care needs are, please make sure you pass him on to someone who really want to take him on and understands precisely the challenges this will bring. I am a tortoise ownerr myself and have been for over 60 years so know what I am talking about. www.facebook.com/groups/233659976732448

and its not true. Cloacal absorption has been disproved.

I had one when I was little, gorgeous creatures. My mum used to put him to hibernate in the shed wrapped in a towel in a cardboard box. He definitely drank from a saucer. He was lovely.

Well isn’t she a delight- selfish to the last.

there is a few tortoise rehoming groups in the UK. If you give them a quick google you can email them.

Stop guilt tripping op, this is her adult daughters pet.

Yes, definitely a sanctuary or rescue type place, then they can always find him a home if they can't keep him. Definitely do not offer him to a school etc.

This is your daughter’s problem to solve OP. She’s 22, not 12, and needs to feel every ounce of guilt that comes along with the lifelong responsibility of taking on a pet that you subsequently choose to give up because it’s no longer convenient.

Tim Dowling has written some lovely columns about his wife's tortoise in the Guardian recently. Even more lovely, perhaps, are the reader comments. If would seem that tortoises capture human hearts!

PS please impress on her that she shouldn’t get ANY other pets until she grows the fuck up

Where do you live? I've thought about getting one, someone like me would adopt him

As well as veg my spur-thighed used to enjoy a bit of pork pie occasionally, also my bare toes if I didn't watch out. I had a Herman's for many years as well. They ate salad stuff, dandelions, etc. And whatever they fancied in the flowerbeds. They hibernated in the compost heap. I had both for over 20 years and they seemed very healthy, though I reluctantly had to rehome them when I moved somewhere without a suitable garden.

Parents are often left looking after their children's pets when child leaves home. Presumably your daughter is going into a flat so cannot take her tortoise.

I know you feel it is a big responsibility but, honestly, if it came to it I doubt you will let him go, he/she is very much part of your life now. If you gave him away I bet you'd be getting him back within no time.

They are lovely animals.

Good luck.

I wasn’t trying to guilt trip the OP. It just read like no one else would be good enough so maybe she wants to seek validation for keeping him?

But if she doesn’t, that’s okay too. She sounds very caring and I’m sure she will do the best to find a good home for him.

Apologies, to the OP.

We've had a family tortoise for over 50 years too. He’s a character and we’re very fond of him but he’s a big responsibility. In the old days people knew no better than 'bung him in a cardboard box of straw to hibernate in the garage' but we’re all more clued up now, thank goodness. Nobody should have a tortoise if they’re not prepared to look after them well.

OP, you sound as though you’re doing a great job, but I’m sure you could find him a loving home with an experienced owner who’d care for him just as carefully.

Tortoise rescue?

You're going to have to re home him, that's really the only solution. I'd put all my efforts into finding a decent home for him.

Did you not think about the age they live when you bought him? The google answer - they can live to 100 plus would have put an end to that conversation right then.

@unsurewhattodoaboutit Her daughter bought him and has expected her Mum to look after him, it was irresponsible.

I agree that rehoming him might be the best idea. And make sure that your DD knows that she mustn't lumber you with her pet again!

Sorry deleted as my last statement was incorrect.

I’ve sent you a pm about a rehoming centre.
They took mine when I moved house.

Just to add, the Tortoise Trust has fizzled out. The two who did run it moved to Spain.

This is not true. The Tortoise Trust is still active in education, research and rehoming.

Yes, Andy & Nadine moved to Spain, but Julie, the TT rehoming coordinator, is in the UK.

you can buy seeds of dandelions and plant them in a pot in your garden

You sound like a wonderful owner, thank you for caring and looking after him the way you do.

In your shoes I would 100% not want your daughter to take him. He could have a truly horrible life living in some flat somewhere with a young woman who begrudges his existence.

I think you should either find a sanctuary or pay a local kid who loves animals to forage for him and look after him every day. That would be an awesome pocket money job for a responsible child.