Advice regarding friend/partner

[beadystar]

I have a good friend of over ten years. (We’re early 40s). The dynamic has shifted lately and I’m not sure how to handle it for the best.
Background- in the last year, I have landed a better job and started a relationship that is for the most part very happy.
I suspect friend is used to me being the single one with the dull job.
Partner and I have had a bump or two and if friend had had her way, I would have deleted and blocked partner immediately rather than working it out.
Anyway, I was at an event a few days ago and friend was rude to partner, (possibly unintentionally) who is now upset with me.
Additional details- friend has become very image-conscious and I’ve noticed some side eyes at my clothes.
I really dislike confrontation and this is a long friendship, but I also can’t stand that my lovely partner felt hurt. What do I do here?

What were these bumps?

Communication difficulties that have since been resolved.

Its hard to tell if your friend is rightfully suspicious and thinks he's not a lovely partner or if she's being unreasonable tbh

Stop discussing every little argument in your relationship with anyone else your friend.

I never understand people who do this.

Yes, if she only hears you moaning about him, what do you expect?

If you have been complaining about your boyfriend to your friend and he's been mean to you, then shes going to not like him. Either stop telling her everything or accept that this is how it is.

Don't rewrite history and the present to suit your narrative - has she given any indication that she's jealous as she's used to you being single or is that something you've made up to phase her out because your boyfriend doesn't like her?

Yes this.
@beadystar Unfortunately not all people have ability to be tactful and mindful of what they’re saying in which case you can’t have it both ways. Stop confiding in your bestie.

I was at an event a few days ago and friend was rude to partner, (possibly unintentionally) who is now upset with me.

Is your partner mainly upset because of what she said, or because you had to admit that you've been discussing him with her?

You’re being very cagey. Is there a reason for this?

Honestly just keep them separate. Keep seeing your friend as you did before, is there any need to bring in your partner? Don't tell one party the others business.

Do you actually want to continue the friendship with her?

If you feel she's giving you negative vibes, then you're allowed to detach from her, just as you're allowed to detach from a partner.

(I must admit I did use the excuse of a new boyfriend to detach from a very clingy dominating controlling friend in my 20s!)

I'm quite a private person, dating in my 40s I'm super wary about mixing social groups. It often ends in tears.

I'm also realising that I don't really waste time in maintaining friendships now if I feel they're not supportive, life's too short and you can always meet new people!

Why is he upset with you because she was unintentionally rude? That seems weird.

Why is your partner upset at you when it was your friend who was rude?

Sorry, just realised I have posted exactly the same as the previous poster.