Struggling to make friends

[misslwills]

Hi, is anyone able to give any advice etc.?

I'm 31 and dont really have any friends. I stayed in my university city after graduating for work so lost contact with school friends (I tried to maintain it but stopped getting responses).

I dont really have any relationships through work other than acquaintances who I meet occasionally for coffee (couple times a year).

I've tried taking up hobbies and have joined a sports club, but either am too old for the going out every weekend crowd, and dont have a child to fit in with the mum crowd (only just started ttc).

I feel a little like Ive tried to build a rapport with people but its often quite one sided, they already have established friendships so Im just an acquaintance. Husbands friends partners are nice enough, but again have their own friends and dont reciprocate any effort to build a friendship.

If I wanted to go for a drink, to the cinema, to a gig etc. the only person I have to ask is my husband, and when he's out/away with his friends I dont have anyone to see/meet.

Im getting really lonely and finding it quite difficult. I dont really know what to do next, ive been trying to be more proactive for about a year now and things dont seem to be clicking. I feel quite pathetic and like something is wrong with me. Does anyone have any advice on how to make friends? Im keen to avoid any apps if possible. Thank you

I moved to a new area and don't really have any friends either it's cry lonely at times I have people from work I see occasional and one close but see once a moth friend for tea, sister lives away and other sister who I see alot was and now is with a control freak who stops us seeing her, I was thinking about using friend apps but god that's gotta be sad hasn't it!!!! X

I think people need to join in with groups that meet regularly eg book group, church groups, quiz group, choir and then ask people if they want to meet up for coffee. Maybe think about things you like doing and is it likely there will be a group. Walking groups seem friendly and often go for a pub meal or coffee. Some people on here have mentioned a website Meet Up but it was mentioned it had increased prices. Eventbrite cover a lot of local events. It is often worth popping into a library to see firstly if any groups meet there and to find out what is going on. If you are older U3A seem very friendly and run all sorts of groups including lunch meetings. Bookshops especially independent ones often run book groups and author visits. Waterstones usually run a reading group as well. There are a few ideas. Volunteering if you have the time can be useful. That would most likely involve meeting up for coffee .Sports groups are often mentioned on here. If you are interested in running park runs seem popular and often need helpers and are friendly. It will be interesting to see what else is mentioned on here .It probably is the case of thinking about what interests you.