How Long Do You Think This Can Last?

[YellowGuido]

Likely to be long, so I apologise…
I (F46) have been with BF (45) for almost six years. We each have two children from previous relationships (me DS17, DD13 / him DS10 / DD18)
Originally BF had his children one evening during the week and EOW. Mine with me 100%.
We would spend a lot of time together and we would stay over at each other’s houses a few times a week. We would also spend time together with all of the kids & everyone got on well until…
About 18 months ago, BFs ex-wife kicked their daughter out for having underaged sex with her boyfriend, so obviously moved in with her dad. This obviously changed things a little, but we worked around it and all was well.
Recently his ex wife decided to move about an hour’s drive away, but has chosen to leave their DS in his current school - so he too has moved in with my BF.
I am pleased for BF that he now gets much more time with his children, but it does mean that we can no longer spend nights together and even seeing each other is very difficult.
Moving in together is not an option.
What do I do here? I can’t see things lasting when we’re now essentially in the friend zone…or am I being overly negative??

If you spent time at each others houses when you had your kids, why can you no longer do it when he has his kids?

I understood that you have your kids 100 percent of the time - so not sure what difference does it make now if he has his all the time as well…

I am not understanding the issue here. It has been 6 years, you already have introduced the kids etc, why is it different now you both have your kids 100% of the time? Surely this is a good thing and you can blend things and spend more time together?

You can still see each other, do you mean as he can’t stay overnight you won’t be having sex? You’ll just have to get more creative. His 18yr old DD can babysit sometimes, or can the 10yr old come along for the weekend too? Sure you can find a way.

So its only a problem when he has his children 100% but not an issue when you have yours 100%?
Trying to understand?

Not sure why people are struggling,

I get it - when one person has their kids all the time it's ok because the person that doesn't can stay overnight when they don't have their kids.

If you both have your kids all the time, you can do family type stuff in the daytime but not sleep over unless kids sleep over too (not great for them) or they both happen to be out.

Well you either want to make it work (in which case get creative prioritise sex and the relationship) or you don't ( be negative and give up because it's a bit complicated). Entirely up to both of you. Just make sure you're on the same page.