What do you do when you meet someone online you have things in common with but you don't click!

[Appalonia]

It's so frustrating. I had a blind date tonight with a guy who seemed perfect on paper, lots of interests in common. I was really excited to meet him. But when we met, v soon, I realised there was no chemistry or spark between us. He's a dj, writes pub quizzes and is really interested in travel, all things that I'm interested in. I was trying to figure out why I wasn't into him and the two main things were, that, the only question he asked about me was if I had kids, and he didn't make me laugh.

I haven't dated since Covid times and thought it was time to put myself out there again, but tonight has just reminded me of how dispiriting and disappointing the whole thing is. I don't know whether to give this guy another chance, or just knock it on the head. God I hate internet dating!

You politely tell them there's no spark and you simply can't force this.

Nah move on. If you know, you know!

I think tonight is a good start for showing you what you want! Don’t let it put you off dating!

The man might have had all the same interests as you but his personality didn’t match yours and that’s okay. He sounds like he was very focussed on himself and wanted to show off how cool and funny he is but it didn’t translate well to you.

He could have had first date nerves or this is how he really is, entirely up to you if you want to meet again. I would see how you feel in a few days, if he suggests meeting up then go with you gut feeling! No harm going for a second date and seeing how it is but also okay to politely decline his offer!

Chin up. You only need one ‘Yes’ in a sea of ‘Nope’s.

The issue wasn’t the guy, the issue was your expectations. You let your imagination fill in the blanks. You assumed he’d be funny - that’s why you are disappointed.

Well, asking more than a single question about the other person on a first date is hardly an unreasonable expectation.

Thank you so much for your replies. One reason I thought he might be different is, the comment he made about my online pics, wasn't about my appearance, but he actually knew the really obscure place I'd been to in India. That never happens! I suppose I just felt we didn't have a dialogue, and I started to feel bored quite quickly. However, I know from previous experience, instant chemistry doesn't necessarily translate into a good relationship...