Why would he do this?

[Cantthink222]

I’m not even sure why I’m writing this, I guess I’m just baffled and looking for clarity and to rant?

I’ve been seeing this guy for just under a year now. We’re meant to be going away this weekend together as we’re both childfree for once but he’s dropped the bombshell on me tonight that he just wants us to be fwb now, I have of course told him that’s not something I want and asked if that’s all he’s seen us as this whole time. He told me no but how he felt changed a few months back but has kept me around since then. So instead of being honest and open with me he’s lead me to believe we were something we’re not. I’m so angry, upset and confused. Why would anyone do this to someone they supposedly care about?

He met someone else?

Yuck. He’s lied to you and now told you he basically wants a green light to pursue other women whilst getting the same amount from you as he’s getting now.

Tell him to absolutely fuck off.

Because he isn’t feeling it but still wants sex until he gets a better offer.

Tell him to fuck off

Cherchez la femme.

He wants you to be his backup, break glass in case of emergency girlfriend.

I think the most confusing part for me is he wants fwb but also said he wants to keep it between us so we wouldn’t be meeting anyone else. I’m no fool I understand he’s saying that so I wouldn’t be meeting anyone else (wouldn’t anyway not my vibe) while he can do whatever the fuck he wants.

To answer your question @Cantthink222 of why do people do this? I have absolutely no idea. I am a man, and it doesn't compute for me either.

My suggestion is to fuck him off and find someone who wants the same as you. You can't second guess him, and some things just don't make sense. You cannot change this, so just accept it, chalk it up to experience, and move on.

He has had other women

So he wants to be exclusive friends with benefits with you? Ummm, why not just be in a relationship then? The definition of which is someone you fuck exclusively!

Kindly, is he just trying to break up but without being the bad guy? Letting you know not to expect a future with him but he will keep fucking you until he does find someone he wants a future with?!

Either way, my advice stands, tell him to absolutely fuck off!!

He doesn't see a future with you but wants to carry on having sex until he meets someone else. He's a peach.

So he wants to sleep with you but not be seen in public with you.

Wow.

Hes a using prick just looking for a warm body. Presumably hes got the hots for someone else and needs a shag from someone in the meantime. That’s where you come in to be a vessel for him to use. Delightful guy. Not.

Dump and move on. Sorry OP.

He was the one that arranged this weekend away, telling me last week that he loves me reassuring me I am what he wants. That’s what’s pissed me off the most I think.

I have 100% told him to fuck off.