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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Trust my intuition? Could be wrong.

1 reply

Imonlysaying · 26/06/2025 17:13

Feel like I’m going mad sometimes as my intuition is telling me one thing and I don’t trust it.
Husband of 24 years told me he had been addicted to porn before we got engaged. I was young, it didn’t matter. Everything was fine and as far as I was concerned it was in the past. I am not a prude. Sex life fine, if uninspiring.
The first time I left the house with our first baby, I realised I had left my card, went home, found him with porn.
Ok, fine. But I didn’t realise that he had effectively written off our sex life. For the next 20 years he has barely noticed me sexually. He loves me, but I can remember crying myself to sleep on nights (anniversaries, holidays etc) when I thought he might show some sexual interest in me and didn’t.
He is otherwise pretty perfect. Considerate, a great Dad. But is there something else going on here?
My gut tells me yes but he tells me (and I believe him?) no.
I don’t know what to feel or what advice I am asking for. Just disappointed I suppose.

OP posts:
Laiste · 26/06/2025 17:30

You get less time for murder OP. I think you've done your bit sticking round for 20 years with no sexual relationship with him ....

Time to go and find somebody who will love you more than his own hand 💐

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