I am an idiot

[CM97]

So for the last 3 months I’ve been putting up with daily breadcrumbs and excuses about being busy from someone I’ve been dating for a year, I’ve made excuses for him because he said he struggles to cope with closeness because of his childhood and he lives 2 hours away.

Tonight my friend and neighbour came across him on Tinder.

I sent him a screenshot of his profile and a longish message, pointing out the irony that he only showed up on her feed because he was 30 miles away. He replied with

“I apologise for hurting you. I was in xxx for meetings”

Well that’s a year I won’t get back. 😔

Block and move on.

You need to find out why you chose to accept his bs for a year!

This is so hurtful and disappointing.

Anyone who ‘struggles with closeness’ - whether that’s due to childhood trauma, or plain old inability to keep it in his pants - is not the partner for you, if closeness is what you’re after.

Thank goodness for your friend and neighbour or God knows how much more of your time he’d have wasted. Prick.

Research the words ‘dismissive avoidant’ on google and I’m sure a lot of it will ring true in your situation. They are pretty much emotionally unavailable and do not change.

I also put up with this sort of bread crumbing shit for the best part of a year and him
accusing me of being ‘too intense’ for wanting to see him more than twice in 6 months!! He then decided to block me for calling him out on his ridiculous flakey, passive aggressive, gaslighting behaviour! Never ever will I put myself through this again.