What is ex doing?

[maleNeedshelp]

Recently been though a heartbreaking split from my gf (not my decision). I made it clear to her that I couldn’t continue being friends with her on social media and I even deleted her number. She also thought that this was for the best, as she didn’t want to be witness to me getting on with my life, and potentially posting new partners etc. This was how it was left, and I started to grieve the loss of her and begin to put the broken pieces of myself back together.

Recently I have been posting stories about life events & successes that I have achieved through work, or in my personal life. My latest story was uploaded yesterday & this morning I got out the shower, loaded up the social media and found a friend request from her.

Why has she done this, as it’s left me confused to what she said about not wanting to see my future life unfold.

Delete, Block, Move on.

Yeah that is bound to make anyone´s mind go "what, and WHy?

Regardless of gender people only do this so they can check to see if there is still "interest, and to see if they still have a candle lit with you. So I would just ignore the request. Nothing good will come from it, only prolong the feeling of confusion and loss. So dont do that to yourself.
Lastly, if she really, really wanted to contact you and if she really, really respected you, she would have made a call to you, to see how you were, then ask you if it was ok to send a request. That is the decent thing to do in my opinion.

She can chase you, if she wants you. Put in the work, take some risks and show she is worth it. She had her chance.

You sound like you are doing well. Without her.

Take the win.

I would delete the request. My honest opinion is that you should never go back to a relationship that ended. I'm not suggesting that's where she's heading but if you were to accept the request, I suspect she'll be looking to see if you're still holding a candle for her. You have no ties to her at all, therefore keep it as a clean break. Yes, initially it's hard, but as time goes on, you will move forward with your life, and all she'll be is part of your past.

Delete and ignore. You are moving on well so just carry on.

She too is going through a “grief pathway” probably. This sounds like she is curious to know how split has impacted you, and sounds a bit like she may be doing the old bargaining with herself “what if I hadn’t done x” “what if I did y”, “what was not good enough” type things maybe

i would certainly reject the friend request , but maybe send her a message privately to say you think at this stage it’s best to allow each other privacy to move on with your lives separately. Then allow her to respond once, in case she has a very good reason (not sure what that might be!) then block private messages and other social media and comms from her.

She found out that the grass wasn’t greener and is now crawling back.

Don't put yourself through it again. Delete and block her.

You are not something to be discarded at her whim and then picked up again when she’s bored.

So many possible reasons:

She has seen youstart to recover and wants to reel you back in.

She's seen you start to reocver and she thinks that therefore you can be friends.

She has recovered so assumes you have and that you can now chang the goalposts.

She wants to see MORE of what is happening in your life because she's been keeping tracka nd to do that she needs more direct social media access.

She was sneaily looking at you rpublic posts and accidentally sent you a friend request.

It doesn't matter nayway - just delete it and move on. Maybe make your settings less open.

Thanks for your reply. My settings are private, so she is unable to see any posts unless she is a friend.

I reckon it was accidental too. So embarrassing when that happens! At least you know she was thinking about you. You obviously meant a lot to her even though it wasn’t to be.

I’d decline the request though