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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Worried about friend

26 replies

SunnyBlueSeal · 20/06/2025 10:35

My very good friend moved to a different location 3 years ago after her divorce She now lives about 4 hours away. She met someone about a year ago and seems really happy. I only seen her about 4 times since she moved away ( she doesn't drive so it's up to me to make the journey ) but we often text/call. Last time I spoke to her was couple of weeks ago and I was a bit harsh with her. I texted her afterwards and apologised and said I can come and see her this weekend. She was really excited to introduce me to her new boyfriend. So I WhatsApp her this Wednesday about 8pm to confirm if the weekend is still on and nothing changed. I didn't hear anything from her. I know her for 25 years and she always reply straight away. Last time she was seen on whatsapp was Wednesday 6pm. She still didn't read my message. I tried calling her yesterday and it goes straight to her voicemail. This is so out of her character. I don't know contact for any of her new friends or her boyfriend. She is a teacher but I can't remember which school. I wouldn't normally worry if any of my other friends didn't reply. I just have this very bad feeling that something happened to her. Would police do a welfare check if I asked them? I feel ridiculous to call the police because my friend didn't answer her phone or used whatsapp for two days but I can't shake this feeling that something is wrong. I'm suppose to drive to hers tomorrow but I'm considering going there tonight after work

OP posts:
babystarsandmoon · 20/06/2025 10:36

Maybe she’s blocked you.

Taxswellian · 20/06/2025 10:39

As a teacher if she didn't turn up to work without notice they'd check on her.

justkeepswimingswiming · 20/06/2025 10:42

The school would check up on her if she didnt turn up to work. Maybe shes still upset with you being harsh.

LadyLucyWells · 20/06/2025 10:43

Could be a broken phone. Maybe try an email?

Original poster
SunnyBlueSeal · 20/06/2025 11:10

She didn't block me. I have tried her email but she didn't reply. I know the school would check on her but how do I find out if she is ok? I just heard from our mutual friend. I asked her to see if she can contact her. She can't contact her either. Her phone goes to voicemail

OP posts:
ClickClickety · 20/06/2025 13:08

Look up the schools near her and go through the staff lists then when you've found the right one leave a message for her.

livelovelough24 · 20/06/2025 16:55

You were going to go to see her this weekend, right? So, I would just go. Knock on her door and see if she is ok.

whatisheupto · 20/06/2025 20:51

Any news OP?

Ydkiml · 20/06/2025 22:25

She may of lost her phone and battery has died !

Original poster
SunnyBlueSeal · 20/06/2025 22:31

whatisheupto · 20/06/2025 20:51

Any news OP?

I have left work a bit earlier and decided to drive up to her. I got here about an hour ago and she wasn’t at home. I knocked on her neighbour’s door and they said there was an ambulance outside on Wednesday evening and it looked serious. Her boyfriend was there as well. They didn’t know which hospital she would be going to as there are couple major ones near by. I just left the neighbour’s house and going to try the hospitals. I tried to ring her phone a few times and it did ring but no one answered

OP posts:
whatisheupto · 20/06/2025 23:21

So sorry to hear that OP. I hope she's OK and you find her tonight. Let us know if u can.

NotaCoolMum · 20/06/2025 23:28

oh no I hope she’s ok ❤️‍🩹

RentalWoesNotFun · 21/06/2025 00:01

Oh God I hope she’s ok.

Original poster
SunnyBlueSeal · 21/06/2025 09:14

I’m absolutely devastated. I kept trying to call my friend on the way to hospital, in hope she will answer and tell me where she is. Someone answered and it was her boyfriend. He told me that my friend suffered devastating subarachnoid haemorrhage. There was no brain activity but she was kept alive on the life support. She suffered another event and they couldn’t save her. She passed away on Thursday night. Her boyfriend met me back and my friend’s house and let me in so I have somewhere to sleep but he didn’t stay, so now I’m here on my own. He is going to collect her mum from the airport and then we will figure out what to do next

OP posts:
heroinechic · 21/06/2025 10:04

I’m so sorry for your loss @SunnyBlueSeal. The strength of your friendship is evident from your posts. We should all be so lucky to have friends like you, I’m sure she felt that too.

Missj25 · 21/06/2025 10:12

SunnyBlueSeal · 21/06/2025 09:14

I’m absolutely devastated. I kept trying to call my friend on the way to hospital, in hope she will answer and tell me where she is. Someone answered and it was her boyfriend. He told me that my friend suffered devastating subarachnoid haemorrhage. There was no brain activity but she was kept alive on the life support. She suffered another event and they couldn’t save her. She passed away on Thursday night. Her boyfriend met me back and my friend’s house and let me in so I have somewhere to sleep but he didn’t stay, so now I’m here on my own. He is going to collect her mum from the airport and then we will figure out what to do next

Ah OP ..
I am so , so sorry 😔 x

Sunblocker · 21/06/2025 10:15

Such a terrible outcome. Sending you love- what a great friend you are xx

whatisheupto · 21/06/2025 13:42

Oh my goodness OP I am so so sorry for you. That is just awful. You must be in shock. You sound like such a lovely friend and it's amazing that you knew something wasn't right and drove to find her. She was very lucky to have such a good friend. I hope you have support to help you at this awful time.

ivegotthisyeah · 21/06/2025 13:53

So sorry heart breaking.

Zanatdy · 21/06/2025 13:59

I’m so sorry. I couldn’t get in touch with a friend over Christmas. Neither could a few of her family and friends. I was away or i’d have drove over. Her daughter finally checked on her and she was almost delirious, not eaten or drank in days. She was diagnosed with cancer that had spread to her brain and passed 9wks later. Miss her so much. If it’s unusual for someone not to reply i’ll be going over in future, as we all felt so bad she was there a couple of days at least like that. Losing a friend is tough, take care of yourself.

Spendysis · 21/06/2025 14:21

So sorry op

ApolloandDaphne · 21/06/2025 14:25

That is devastatingly sad to know. Hopefully you, her BF and her mum can all support each other over the next days and weeks.

Original poster
SunnyBlueSeal · 21/06/2025 15:32

Thank you everyone. I was the lucky one having her as a friend. That’s why I knew something wasn’t right. She would never not get in touch with me. Her mum is doing very badly. I don’t know how she will get through it. I’m mostly still in shock. We had to go to the hospital today to collect her belongings and arrange all the practical stuff. The doctor who looked after said the bleed on her brain was so big, that even if it happened right there in the hospital, they wouldn’t be able to save her

OP posts:
NormaSears · 21/06/2025 15:35

@SunnyBlueSeal .You were a good friend. Flowers

Rainbows41 · 21/06/2025 17:31

I hope the coroners can determine the cause of the hemorrhage

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