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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationship advice

4 replies

Red378910 · 13/06/2025 22:19

Hello, I just want some advice. So I was talking to this guy and I really like him, we've been talking every single day especially on the phone. A couple days ago he called me and we just talked then he randomly asked me if I was head over heels for a guy, like he was everything I wanted in someone but had 5 kids would I be with him and I said i wouldnt bc that's just a personal preference of mine with the kids. I asked where that was coming from and at first he didnt wanna tell me he just kept saying hes creative that way then he finally told me and it was about one of his exes. He then told me their story how they dated in high school, broke up, lost touch and years later she contacted him and they stsrted dating again, it was on and off for 2 yrs bc of the kids situation, she had 5 kids and in the end he just couldn't do it. Of course he said he loved her and was hurt by it bc she was his best friend. She was just everything he wanted in someone but with thaf many kids it got overwhelming for him. He said he just she wasn't his person and there is someone better for him out there and wants to be with someone with no kids so they can one day start a family of their own. So after thst talk, we just talked about other things, he stsrted talking about how he wants to see me, asked if I fbink about him and if I do, what do I envision etc. He then says he was gonna take a nap and csll me back later. So after we hung up, I just thought to myself that the way he spoke about her it felt like there was possibly some feelings there for her. So he did eventually call but I couldn't be on the phone so I texted him and I told him that it seemed like there might still be unresolved feelings and I didnt wanna be caught in between. I told him how great he is and I just wanna make sure I wanna be with someone who is fully present and ready. I haven't heard back. If I dont hear back today, it'll be 3 days.

OP posts:
atoo · 13/06/2025 22:22

Have you actually met the guy yet?

Red378910 · 13/06/2025 22:41

No not yet, that day when he mentioned about his ex was when we finally talked about seeing each other. I just wanted the clarity that since we did discuss about going out, he is present and ready bc I am and I am looking for someone with serious intentions.

OP posts:
GuevarasBeret · 13/06/2025 22:45

You did the right thing. Well done you. I would not give him too long before unmatching.

Red378910 · 13/06/2025 22:48

Thank you, I was having doubts that if I should have said anything but I felt like i needed to let him know how I felt and just wanted to clear the air about it and make sure I didn't misinterpret him

OP posts:
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