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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Relationship ended because of my life

33 replies

Clarasmum444 · 10/06/2025 09:11

Been in a relationship for 2 years. He recently ended it because of my responsibilities. I have a dd16 and 3 dogs. He knew all of this before he got with me. He said his life is restricted because I can't just up and leave to go on holidays!
Good riddance if that's how he feels but surely most people have responsibilities and can't just up and leave?!

OP posts:

Crushed23 · 10/06/2025 13:22

Perhaps he thought a 16 year-old would be quite independent and could be left at home without adult supervision, and could also manage to walk and feed dogs. I don’t think that’s an unreasonable assumption unless you’ve left out a bit about your child needing more care than a typical 16 year-old.

It doesn’t sound like you’re compatible anyway, and the not seeing his kids is a massive red flag, yes.

GuevarasBeret · 10/06/2025 13:22

Clarasmum444 · 10/06/2025 09:25

He does have children, 3 teenagers but doesn't see them. That should have been my first reg flag

Did you know that at the start?

Is it possible he’s lying OP, and he just doesn’t see the relationship going anywhere?

Either way, it wasn’t working for him, so he did the decent thing and ended it. I wouldn’t put too much effort into making him your “crazy ex.” just move on.

Foreverhope1 · 10/06/2025 13:33

englishandelegant · 10/06/2025 09:22

Maybe he didn’t realise the realities of children and pets. He’s been honest at this point. You are allowed your life with your much loved dogs and daughter and all the joy that brings, equally he is allowed his life with impulsivity and freedom to do as he pleases. None of your lives are wrong.
Focus on your child and ensure she is ok. 2 years is a big chunk of her life and at a crucial stage developmentally in terms of navigating relationships and self worth, so to have someone significant there for 2 years and then suddenly out her life will impact her as well. Look after you and your daughter and maintain a calm environment.

This

cool4cats2020 · 10/06/2025 13:38

It should be getting easier now that your dd is 16. That's probably what he was anticipating anyway.

Sugargliderwombat · 10/06/2025 13:48

I'd be annoyed if we couldn't do things because of dogs. Maybe be didn't realise what a bind they'd be?

BruFord · 10/06/2025 14:00

Honestly, getting rid of this deadbeat Dad is the best idea long term. You don’t want to be with someone like him, you deserve someone better. 💐

PoliteRaven · 10/06/2025 14:10

I reckon it takes at least 2 years to get to know someone and figure out if they're a good fit.... Chalk it down to experience....

Gyozas · 10/06/2025 14:12

Clarasmum444 · 10/06/2025 09:25

He does have children, 3 teenagers but doesn't see them. That should have been my first reg flag

Oh. How disgusting he is. 🤮 The garbage took itself out.

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