Just want a break away without dh

[YellowBlueStar]

Not been getting along with dh for a while. I've seen a lovely hotel and am toying with the idea of booking a couple of nights for myself. Just to rest, relax and have some peace away from his negativity. I haven't told him this but I know he will blow it up out of proportion; he'll play the victim and tell people I've left him. Don't know how to phrase it to him. He goes away about three times a year with friends to take part in sporting events but he won't understand me wanting to go away on my own. Any suggestions?

Nail on head - my H is exactly the same if I ever say I’m having a few days away , partly I think because he knows he’s hard to live with .

'He'll tell people...'

This is a huge red flag here, you're living your life according to the narrative your DH may paint to others. You must find a way to stop caring what he says to them whether you stay together or not.

Quite frankly if your not able to go away alone or with family or friends there's something very wrong. I love going with hubby but I also love going away on my own or with a friend. No excuses needed I will just say hey babe I'm away for a couple of days soon and he will asked where etc n while I'm away we will still text or not as I usually forget my charger lol but ye no problems and very enjoyable

Well done. I hope you enjoy your time away and that you have space to think whatever thoughts need thinking or just to rest

The niceness is no surprise, his little world is rocking, he needs to keep things steady. Be prepared for repurcussions further down the line, don't forget grey rock

@YellowBlueStar enjoy it OP -

You should do this whether your marriage is struggling or not. Don’t make it about your marriage. My husband takes the dog on a short term-time break each year. He and the dog walk all day and enjoy a pint and a pub supper in the evening. I encourage it.