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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Heartbreak- just need to vent

9 replies

AmorFati31 · 07/06/2025 13:30

So I’ve just blocked and been blocked by one of my best friends. I’d started to get feelings for him after months of flirting, sending sexy photos, supporting each other, hours of talking on the phone, cuddling and kissing. But he has a new girlfriend (who sounds horrendous, but that’s a whole new topic!)
Anyway he’s said he feels let down by me as we are ‘only friends’ and that he’d switched off from when we previously met and it was flirty.
I’m so so sad and angry. I feel completely used and discarded as I know it wasn’t just me who was behaving as more than friends and he’d rather chase a horrendous woman than be with one who was so so good to him and for him.
hurts like hell at the moment. I’ll regain some fight eventually. Just feeling crap at the mo.

OP posts:
OchreRaven · 07/06/2025 13:37

He’s not your best friend. She isn’t the problem.

Original poster
AmorFati31 · 07/06/2025 13:38

No I 100% agree. She isn’t. She’s not the villain in anyway. He ‘was’ my best friend.

OP posts:
Original poster
AmorFati31 · 07/06/2025 13:38

OchreRaven · 07/06/2025 13:37

He’s not your best friend. She isn’t the problem.

No I 100% agree. She isn’t. She’s not the villain in anyway. He ‘was’ my best friend.

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 07/06/2025 13:42

You don’t send your best friend ‘sexy pictures’ or ‘cuddles and kisses’.
He was using you as a friend with benefits until he found someone her likes better.
Don’t ever take him back.

Timeforabiscuit · 07/06/2025 13:47

It hurts because he betrayed your trust and used your time and effort to prop his ego.

It's not your fault your hurting - you weren't "just friends" he didn't want to pull the relationship trigger and that's fine too, it's the "oohh we were just breezy!" - he's not partner material.

Take care of yourself, acknowledge that he was important for a time, pick out one thing you've learned - and then crack on with your fantastic self.

jjandjj · 07/06/2025 13:55

Is she really horrendous? He obviously doesn’t think so and I’m sure you’re hurt but making out she’s horrendous is probably why you’ve been blocked by the man who loves her.

Original poster
AmorFati31 · 07/06/2025 13:58

jjandjj · 07/06/2025 13:55

Is she really horrendous? He obviously doesn’t think so and I’m sure you’re hurt but making out she’s horrendous is probably why you’ve been blocked by the man who loves her.

Domestic violence, stalking, controlling and convictions for it.
so whilst I appreciate what you’re saying. I’d say they were pretty horrendous things.

OP posts:
Original poster
AmorFati31 · 07/06/2025 13:59

Timeforabiscuit · 07/06/2025 13:47

It hurts because he betrayed your trust and used your time and effort to prop his ego.

It's not your fault your hurting - you weren't "just friends" he didn't want to pull the relationship trigger and that's fine too, it's the "oohh we were just breezy!" - he's not partner material.

Take care of yourself, acknowledge that he was important for a time, pick out one thing you've learned - and then crack on with your fantastic self.

Thank you. X

OP posts:
S0j0urn4r · 07/06/2025 17:48

Stay blocked. He's an arsehole and not worth your time.

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