Name change for this. This may be long as don’t want to drip feed
My partner called time on our relationship end of April. He turned cold and things were very strained between us. We have a complicated entwined life, which has combined finances, business and my teenage son of whom he’s been parenting with me.
To start we said we’d take some time to figure out how we’re feeling, then he wanted to split but would continue living together until we finished some work needed for our business and whilst we sorted our finances out. Then he wanted to move out but continue to be business partners. Then he wanted to split fully and have nothing to do with each other.
Turned out he was messaging someone from work. Work found out, he lost his job.
We had an enormous row, he blamed him losing his job on me. He removed everything from our joint account, took all of his stuff and left me to deal with everything, all finances, all jobs etc. He blocked me and said I’d never see or hear from him again, that he hates me and I’ve ruined his life.
The next day he asked to meet to discuss a few things. Basically told me the above and how things were going to be. He was so off, but then after about 30mins started to soften. He asked if he could come back to the house to grab a couple of bits from outside, and asked for goodbye sex.
The next day he called me a few times, said he feels so down. Seemed like he was checking in to see how I was doing, although he was the one to call me, he never once said anything to suggest he wanted to reconcile. He sent a few texts to say he didn’t want to remove himself from the business and we could work together to sort some of the things that needed sorting, as we’d discussed at the very beginning of this all starting.
That brings us to two days ago, he asked if he could come and stay, but in the spare room. He had some other work yesterday and came and stayed last night, but in the spare room. This morning he said he’d be back again tonight, and has a load of work coming up (which was arranged months ago), that he’ll be away for, but after that he’d like to take some time off and spend some time at home doing stuff to help out. He said he didn’t sleep very well and that he misses me and is being a family, but said it’ll take some time for us all to get used to this new norm and he’s just happy that we’re getting along. All of our bedrooms have ensuites, yet he chose to shower in our shower rather than the spare room. He called me my nickname constantly, gave me a few hugs when he got in, and again this morning, Kissed me on the head a few times and said he’d speak to me during the day.
Not once has he said he wants to give our relationship another go, and I feel his words and actions don’t match. To say I’m confused is an understatement. For the record, I only want to be with someone who is all in and wants to build a life together.
Not sure what I want from this, perhaps other peoples views who are not emotionally involved, on what’s going on here.