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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

will he come back?

15 replies

mlx1 · 25/05/2025 00:42

hey everyone, I was seeing a guy for 1.5 months. and we were dating. he was holding my hand in public, introducing me to his friends, going crazy about me, paying for everything and stuff. and we were having so much fun together, overall we were the perfect match. but suddenly one day he told me that he wanna talk about something and when I went to talk with him, he started crying and told me that he wants to commit and start a relationship with me but he can’t ‘ love ‘ me for no reason. I started questioning him but he didn’t even know why he felt that way when everything is perfect and I am the most mature, beautiful, smart , and everything he desire for in a woman. and I suggested him to breakup but he said no and started crying the whole time during the talk. he also told me that he didn’t tell me this to breakup but just to let me know about his feelings, which is very suspicious. after a couple of days he was still acting weird but one day I was enough of this situation and told him that I don’t wanna continue like this unless he is 100% sure about me and willing to commit. after this he told me that he didn’t wanna continue breaking my heart so we decided to end up things, but he was crying again idk why, if he doesnt love me, why is he crying, hugging, kissing and looking into my eyes during the breakup? and he gave me his favorite football team scarf even tho I didn’t wanna take… and he was jealous and complimenting me … and then it all ended and its been a couple of days but I didn’t hear anything from him yet. what should I do?? if we had problems or wasn’t compatible, I would totally understand why we broke up or gave up on each other but he was very sad , seemed regretful. but at the end of the day everything ended and he left me with broken heart. also he was telling me that his friends also didn’t support him about this decision and they were on my side… what do you think? I really need help now :( ( btw sorry for my English ,its not my first language )

OP posts:
Redglitter · 25/05/2025 00:47

Far too much drama for a 6 week relationship. Block his number and move on

MmeChoufleur · 25/05/2025 00:47

It sounds like you’ve been coming on far too strong, demanding love and commitment after just six weeks. You need to lighten up and go with the flow a bit, and let a relationship evolve over time or you will scare men away.

SingleAHF · 25/05/2025 00:48

He sounds crazy and mixed up. You will never get a safe, secure and happy long term relationship from someone like that! Be glad he's gone, he would drive YOU crazy eventually.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 25/05/2025 01:03

Sounds like he's on Spice. Avoid.

RedDiamond · 25/05/2025 01:18

Hope not.

Boreded · 25/05/2025 01:19

Are you 14?

EllasNonny · 25/05/2025 01:24

Run and get some counselling. He's not right in the head, but you're acting far too seriously after a mere six weeks.

MoominMai · 25/05/2025 01:24

I don’t think you need any help tbh. You’ve only been seeing him less than 2 months and told him already you didn’t want to continue seeing see him if he couldn’t commit to you and he replied back he couldn’t. Sounds like he just wasn’t into the relationship anymore but was too cowardly to tell you which is why you’re confused. Forget him and next! ♥️

Poonu · 25/05/2025 01:42

Men don't break up with women they love.

Devianinc · 25/05/2025 01:48

mlx1 · 25/05/2025 00:42

hey everyone, I was seeing a guy for 1.5 months. and we were dating. he was holding my hand in public, introducing me to his friends, going crazy about me, paying for everything and stuff. and we were having so much fun together, overall we were the perfect match. but suddenly one day he told me that he wanna talk about something and when I went to talk with him, he started crying and told me that he wants to commit and start a relationship with me but he can’t ‘ love ‘ me for no reason. I started questioning him but he didn’t even know why he felt that way when everything is perfect and I am the most mature, beautiful, smart , and everything he desire for in a woman. and I suggested him to breakup but he said no and started crying the whole time during the talk. he also told me that he didn’t tell me this to breakup but just to let me know about his feelings, which is very suspicious. after a couple of days he was still acting weird but one day I was enough of this situation and told him that I don’t wanna continue like this unless he is 100% sure about me and willing to commit. after this he told me that he didn’t wanna continue breaking my heart so we decided to end up things, but he was crying again idk why, if he doesnt love me, why is he crying, hugging, kissing and looking into my eyes during the breakup? and he gave me his favorite football team scarf even tho I didn’t wanna take… and he was jealous and complimenting me … and then it all ended and its been a couple of days but I didn’t hear anything from him yet. what should I do?? if we had problems or wasn’t compatible, I would totally understand why we broke up or gave up on each other but he was very sad , seemed regretful. but at the end of the day everything ended and he left me with broken heart. also he was telling me that his friends also didn’t support him about this decision and they were on my side… what do you think? I really need help now :( ( btw sorry for my English ,its not my first language )

Who cares, move on. Seriously , get a grip. You don’t know this man from Adam. Why is he taking up any head space.in your life.

Mummaonherown · 25/05/2025 02:04

Let him go, it's been 6 weeks not 6 years.
You'll be fine, you'll get over it - he sounds crazed

User27563 · 25/05/2025 03:08

He played you - got you to break up with him basically.

Justdontknowanymore2024 · 25/05/2025 03:11

Redglitter · 25/05/2025 00:47

Far too much drama for a 6 week relationship. Block his number and move on

This

Clearlydefinedparameters · 25/05/2025 03:38

User27563 · 25/05/2025 03:08

He played you - got you to break up with him basically.

This!

I’m sorry he lead you on op, but I think you have swerved a bullet there.

You did exactly the right thing and stuck to your boundaries.

You should always take note of men’s actions and not their words.

In blunt terms, he’s probably a narcissist and out for himself. He just wanted sex and not a committed relationship so he love bombed you at the beginning to make you think he was more than just a user.

But he did use you 😥. And he is a weak coward too, because instead of being honest and treating you respectfully when he wanted to split up, he made a big “woe is me” drama about it, again to confuse you and make you think he is better than he is.

He basically manipulated the situation so that you split up with him, leaving him to feel all noble about himself, Eurgh!

You really are much better off without him op!
Learn your lesson and be more circumspect next time. If something seems too good to be true, then it usually is!

I’m really sorry he treated you this way 💐

Pbjsand · 25/05/2025 04:18

Or he had someone else all along who he’s supposed to be committing to.

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