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Original poster

How did you find love after late twenties/ thirties?

39 replies

marie78280 · 02/05/2025 08:59

Question to the women who found love in their late 20s or even 30s. How did you find your partners? I am turning 28 and after a failed relationship I feel like I missed the boat. Haha.
any success stories?

OP posts:
Cabbagefamily · 02/05/2025 09:02

I think it’s normal to “find love” in your late 20s and 30s.

ayvasili · 02/05/2025 09:02

I was 27 when I found love. We will celebrate our 22nd wedding anniversary this year and about to celebrate my 50th birthday (it all went down pretty quickly!). In short my answer is don't give up, it can definitely happen. Mr right is out there 😍

Chasingsquirrels · 02/05/2025 09:04

Late 30's, post divorce - at work.
Mid 40's, post bereavement - OLD.

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 02/05/2025 09:07

A mutual friend introduced us. I was 34.

WayneEyre · 02/05/2025 09:10

At 36! Kissed every frog in the pond (and some nice ones too, just not quite for me), and found the right one for me.

HamYard · 02/05/2025 09:12

I barely know anyone who had ‘settled down’ in a committed relationship by the age of 28!

user8636283907 · 02/05/2025 09:16

Got divorced early 30s.

Found love again mid-30s. We work in the same building, for different companies, met through work/industry events.

MaryGreenhill · 02/05/2025 09:18

OLD

PrettyPuss · 02/05/2025 09:21

Met my exDH at 28, we were married for 22 years, 2 children. I met him through mutual friends. Met my current boyfriend of 4 years age 50, again through mutual friends. My grandmother had a boyfriend after my grandfather died. They were both in their late 70's when they got together.

Nowhere near too late in your late 20's, OP!

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 02/05/2025 09:22

I got out of a long relationship at 29 and thought my days are numbered.
My next ‘big’ birthday is 60. If I could go back and tell my younger self…
Stop worrying about time. You are so young.
Don’t feel time is running out and accept dates you don’t want to go on.
Concentrate on your own life. Develop some more interests, travel if you can, enjoy being young and healthy.
Enjoy your parents if you have a good relationship with them. (I went on holiday with mine aged 30
and had an absolute ball!)
If you can, get on the property ladder.
If you can, take out a private pension even if you put in a small amount each months. In 40 years time, you will thank your younger self.
Stop looking for someone in a romantic sense. You know that feeling when you’ve lost your phone and go all over the house frantically? Don’t look for a partner the same way. One will turn up, just like your phone did!
NEVER go back to an ex.
Don’t ignore a single red flag to
avoid being lonely (it’s better to be on your own than be treated badly!)
Also - I think at 29 you are probably going to look your most beautiful. You know what suits you, and your own style.
Honestly I look back and wonder why I was worried. I did meet someone via a good friend but it took a while as I kissed a few frogs and took very little notice of the above. Bar the pension.

DazedAndConfused321 · 02/05/2025 09:28

I have a lot of friends and know a lot of people still single in late 20s and 30s, and the only ones who have escaped single life were the ones who stopped trying and waited for the right people to turn up. A few success stories on online dating (which I think is a good way to go) but the people who were desperate for partners remain desperate. Also those who have settled down in their 30s hadn't had serious relationships previously, those with previous serious relationships seek too much commitment straight away and are either disappointed or scare their potential partner.

VoodooQualities · 02/05/2025 09:32

At 32 I met my now husband at the pub. It was work drinks - a reunion of past and present team members. I was 'past', he was 'present'. We chatted all night, I took him back to mine, the rest is history!

Doitrightnow · 02/05/2025 09:36

I broke up with my fiancé at 26 and found it so traumatic that I stayed single for 10 years afterwards.

A friend pushed me in to OLD and I ended up marrying the second guy I met through it. Despite that, I loathed online dating. I have several friends who met their spouse through it. Others who met at work or at their hobbies.

If I could go back in time, I would be soooo much more chilled about relationships. I really regret not asking out a few guys for a drink during my decade of singledom. It just built it up in to such a big deal in my head. But now I think, why?!?! Even if he'd said no, it's not a reflection on my lack of worth, two people can be nice and be friends without being right for each other!

Zeitumschaltung · 02/05/2025 09:40

You haven’t missed the boat, you’re right on time. 28 is a great age to meet someone compatible who you won’t grow apart from because you’ve finished growing up. Just make your single life as full and active as you can and meet as many people in real life as possible, not only through online dating.

Gardening1 · 02/05/2025 09:45

I've been with my boyfriend for a year, I'm 29. I met him on Hinge after being single for 3 years and having periods on and off the apps during that time. My advice is to work out what you're looking for in a partner and then go and look for that. So I would go on lots of dates (just one drink or a coffee) with people from apps (probably one a week when I was really trying) 😊 good luck!

BobbinThreadbare123 · 02/05/2025 09:59

Definitely not missed the boat at 28 years old!
I divorced XH at 30 and I went on OLD- remarried to DH a few years later. He was late 30s at that time. We've been very happy for over a decade so far.

Dachshundlass89 · 02/05/2025 13:58

"accept dates you don’t want to go on"

No! Do not do this. It is a compete waste of time. If you're not excited about him/the date, don't go. Ignore people who say shit like "give him a chance!", "he could turn out to be something special!" (he won't) and "you're missing out on some great men!" (you're not): He won't "surprise" you, he won't turn out to be a "hidden gem", attraction won't "grow". I know from experience. Only bother with the ones you want. You only have one life- don't waste it on people you're not excited about. Don't ever feel guilty or bad about not dating these men (or be pushed to date them by well-meaning pals)- they may not be for you, but they'll be perfect for some other woman- they'll survive. Stand firm, don't listen to others and don't settle- you'll know when you meet the right guy xx

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 02/05/2025 15:45

Dachshundlass89 · 02/05/2025 13:58

"accept dates you don’t want to go on"

No! Do not do this. It is a compete waste of time. If you're not excited about him/the date, don't go. Ignore people who say shit like "give him a chance!", "he could turn out to be something special!" (he won't) and "you're missing out on some great men!" (you're not): He won't "surprise" you, he won't turn out to be a "hidden gem", attraction won't "grow". I know from experience. Only bother with the ones you want. You only have one life- don't waste it on people you're not excited about. Don't ever feel guilty or bad about not dating these men (or be pushed to date them by well-meaning pals)- they may not be for you, but they'll be perfect for some other woman- they'll survive. Stand firm, don't listen to others and don't settle- you'll know when you meet the right guy xx

Edited

If you read my full sentence it is…
Don’t feel time is running out and accept dates you don’t want to go on!

ParsnipPuree · 02/05/2025 15:51

Oh my goodness you’re so young.. my dd’s age, you most definitely have not missed the boat! You’ll meet someone who’s probably just come out of a long term relationship.

frozendaisy · 02/05/2025 16:32

30 ish, but this was nearly 20 years ago.

Met in our local pub, we'd've hated each other on OLD, but that wasn't an option back then. So you might just click with someone on "paper" you think, god no!

So you have plenty of time.

Just to add, I wasn't "looking", wasn't prepared to settle for anything other than great just to be married with kids, at first didn't really care one way or another if we were together, took it as it came.

TreeDudette · 02/05/2025 16:39

Early 30s - OLD
Marriage
Late 40s (post divorce) - OLD
Marrying again next year

I have low standards (don't demand 6ft, 6 figure salary or a 6-pack) and firm boundaries (take no messing about, am off at the sight of the first red flag). Have got myself a good one. He is a funny, kind, loving, thoughtful nerd.

Ddakji · 02/05/2025 16:40

At work.

Married at 26, separated at 27, met DH at 29 at work, starting dating at 30. Been together 23 years!

Thisistyresome · 02/05/2025 16:56

My friends broke in to two groups, those who were coupled up by 22/23. Or those who met from their 30s onward.

Loads of success stories in your age bracket.

madaboutpurple · 03/05/2025 20:37

Why not ask friends if they know any single men and arrange to meet up somewhere and see how it goes.

EilishMcCandlish · 03/05/2025 20:46

Hadn't even thought about it aged 28. I was footloose, fancy free and loving life. I didn't graduate until 23. I joined the army at 28. Met husband on an operational tour a couple of years later. Wasn't looking as I was already in a FWB situationship to use modern parlance, but wondering if it might progress. Anyway, met now husband and got engaged 6 months later, married within 2 years.

You have all the time in the world.