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Relationships

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Original poster

Husband wants a baby but…

12 replies

DaringBird23 · 02/05/2025 01:52

I have Hypothyroidism and been instructed by doctor to wait for the levels to go down then proceed. However, my husband doesn’t seem to understand and says that we should go by nature. I am a working mom and under lot of pressure from work and now this. I don’t know what to do I mean I feel like I am a robot or something like I have no feelings or anything. I work full time, take care of baby, pay bills and everything. Yes its ok everyone does that but do my feelings have no respect. I work my ass off during weekdays and then on weekend I look forward to relaxing at home and doing house chores, but he always ends up pissing me off and ruining my day. I cannot always be out I want to be home too.

OP posts:

feelingrobbed · 02/05/2025 01:57

yuck. Don’t have another baby especially not until you’re ready, if ever. Also. Maybe leave him he sounds more than a bit shit

TheHerboriste · 02/05/2025 02:04

Ugh. Are you a walking incubator or his beloved wife???

Ponderingwindow · 02/05/2025 02:40

tell him to do some reading on the potential birth defects from hypothyroidism..

you absolutely can have a healthy baby, but you need to get your condition stabilized first. Then your health team will monitor your levels and adjust meds as needed during pregnancy to keep both of you safe and healthy.

Itsjustsodepressing · 02/05/2025 03:41

I wasn't sure about what Hypothyroidism was when I read your post so I just googled it. And it's affects on pregnancy. If I can do that then why can't your H read up for himself on the condition?

So, as pp said, if your condion is treated and controlled then you can have a healthy baby. But your H is willing to potentially risk the health , not only of you, but your child, by going ahead with a pregnancy at a time when your medical advice is that it's not safe. I would suggest then he doesn't love you and he is not really fit to be a parent if he doesn't want the best for your child.

If he persists in pressurising you over this then quite seriously you should consider leaving this man who is demonstrating a really reckless disregard for your wellbeing.

HoppingPavlova · 02/05/2025 03:59

However, my husband doesn’t seem to understand and says that we should go by nature

Makes zero sense. You need it under control first. His utter disregard for both your and any babies health because ‘nature’ is staggering. Is he also against antibiotics, what about a child having an appendix taken out in the event of an appendicitis or is ‘nature’ better there as well? I’d be really careful having kids with such a person.

MsNevermore · 02/05/2025 04:03

“Should go by nature” 🥴🥴🥴

Until he’s the one growing, carrying and birthing this hypothetical baby, then he gets absolutely no say in when it happens.
Your health should obviously come first. And the fact that he doesn’t see that is a whole carnival of red flags.

BlondiePortz · 02/05/2025 04:57

Well men are a walking sperm machine to lots of women, tell him he is deluded and move on

FortyElephants · 02/05/2025 05:52

Your husband sounds awful

Upinthetreetops · 02/05/2025 08:41

Your husband has no respect for you. That needs to be worked on before even considering another baby with him (if at all).

Isitisit · 02/05/2025 08:47

Does he realise that when it was left to ‘nature’ a huge number of women and babies died during pregnancy and childbirth? Modern medicine and doctors exist for a reason! I would feel extremely hurt how little my husband values me if he made that kind of comment.

nc43214321 · 02/05/2025 09:14

Wow, he really doesn’t care for you. I would be very upset also. Can imagine the hypo symptoms are enough to deal with until you get it under control without adding pregnancy to the mix.

Chiconbelge · 02/05/2025 09:23

As pp have said, it’s not difficult to google pregnancy and hypothyroidism so why can’t your DH do that? The medical support you need is not very complicated but it’s not just ahead of getting pregnant it’s about monitoring you through the pregnancy.

While doctors won’t make you promises about how long it will take to stabilise at the right level, it shouldn’t take very long for most people and you yourself should feel much better (even if you still have a DH problem) on a day to day basis.

If you’ve had untreated hypothyroidism for a while, it will be making you feel truly awful and when it is under control you may feel much better able to deal with DH (in whatever way is best for you!) I’m speaking from personal experience.

Are you possibly in the USA and is paying for care a contributing factor to your DH’s attitude?

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