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Original poster

Dating in your 40s

5 replies

lackofvitamindd · 01/05/2025 18:17

OK, so I’ve met a guy who I met online twice now, he seems lovely, no red flags has an online presence through work so is definitely who he says he is.

Anyway I don’t want to fuck this up as he ticks all my boxes (first time this has ever happened) but this feels more bloody awkward than when I was 18.

Two dates in and we’ve not kissed - should we have - how do I make it known I like him. I said I’d like to meet again, but I feel like I need a bit more than that to make it clear…!

OP posts:
GreenFressia · 01/05/2025 18:38

😂 I'm feeling your awkwardness for your OP. Not sure I have any answers but I was like this - what made it worse was we always seemed to be saying goodbye at a tube station. So I'd go west and he'd go east and there was this really awkward do we kiss moment. It became a running joke with my friends. In reality what made me realise he was interested was that when we were sat down one time, he took my hand and held it. I died it was so cute. Then we kissed.

Also I think I was waiting for him to make the first move, but that's probably an old fashioned way of thinking.

So I'd say just relax. Not sure if that helps.

VoodooQualities · 01/05/2025 18:44

It's been years since I did anything like this but I always favoured the direct approach!

Smile at him, swallow your pride, cross your fingers and say 'I think I quite fancy you, do you mind if we have a kiss?'

Worked for me 90% of the time I'd say! 💪

superplumb · 03/05/2025 21:01

lackofvitamindd · 01/05/2025 18:17

OK, so I’ve met a guy who I met online twice now, he seems lovely, no red flags has an online presence through work so is definitely who he says he is.

Anyway I don’t want to fuck this up as he ticks all my boxes (first time this has ever happened) but this feels more bloody awkward than when I was 18.

Two dates in and we’ve not kissed - should we have - how do I make it known I like him. I said I’d like to meet again, but I feel like I need a bit more than that to make it clear…!

Just lean in for a snog. That's what I'd do. He'd probably really like you to twke the lead.

CalypsoCuthbertson · 03/05/2025 21:03

Which film is it that says you have to lean in 90% and wait for them to move in 10%? Maybe try that!

Waterbreakingwaves · 03/05/2025 21:19
  1. Hug/hold hands.
  1. Linger a bit longer and just stand there in contact.
  1. Kiss his cheek, close to his mouth.

things tend to progress from something like this to the proper kiss.

Do this at a good moment and location. ..private, not overlooked, maybe tipsy but not drunk.

From my dating experience a kiss is great but doesn't actually necessarily mean exclusivity...

so if you haven't had conversations about it yet, bear in mind any physical closeness doesn't mean he's not chatting to others....

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