Over friendly, or am I overreacting?

[Staceysausagedog]

Hiya, I'm looking for advice ladies 😭
My son is currently training to be a bus engineer, and knows all the bus drivers in the local area, and the drivers all know me as I'm his mum.
They're all really friendly guys, but about a year ago one of the drivers asked me for my number, and I kind of avoided it, as I hate talking on the phone.
Didn't really think much of it, I'd say hello in passing, but I always preferred it if I didn't get on his bus.
Anyway, he found me on social media after we had both commented on the same post. We added each other as friends, didn't think anything of it, but now he won't stop messaging me.
I'm not sure whether he's just being friendly or he's after something more, but he now keeps asking for my phone number, which I refuse to as his messages are a bit ott and he's just a bit much. He says I have nice eyes, that I'm very nice, that he wants to see a photo of me (my profile has no photos apart from my profile pic), wants to hear my voice, I get the "you're very nice" about 5 times a day. There's a language barrier which makes it hard for me to determine his intentions.
He's a nice enough guy, I'm just not interested in him like that, and I just feel so anxious about it all, as he literally won't let the phone number thing drop.
I will definitely see him out and about as I usually do, and now I'm panicking about it, and I don't feel like I can say anything because of my son. My sons worked hard to get where he is, and him and the drivers are all friends.
Am I stupid for feeling really anxious? And how do I handle this situation?
I am clueless.

ewww, no op he is OTT.

You are in charge here, not him. If you dont want to give him your number that is that, and seeing he is pressing this I would say he has serious issues with boundaries. He will never respect you seeing he doesnt now. I would block in all honesty.

Have you spoken to your son about this? I know he will want to remain friendly with him, but he needs to back you up too. I'd ignore any messages and just say "Oh I don't give my number out" if you have to speak to him.

Tell him your dp wouldn’t like you giving your phone number out to men. That should shut him up!

Have you told him what you want? He’s harassing you. He sounds like someone with no concept of social norms so you need to spell it out.

’Please stop messaging me’
’I don’t want to give you my number’
’I’m not interested’

….then block if he continues. You’re allowed to be perfectly polite but distant in person at the same time as not letting him into your online world. You get to decide exactly who you let in to which parts of your life in what way.

I would block him straight away. I would feel zero awkwardness about that, because he is probably messaging dozens of other women with the same spammy bullshit. You already know he won't take no for an answer. He's not going to make things awkward for your son; what would he even say? "Your mum won't give me her phone number even though I am cyber stalking her!"

Honestly just block and give no explanation. He's not going to complain to your son about the fact his mum isn't encouraging his unwanted advances.

Just block him.

OP, this driver is highly inappropriate and harassing you. Unfortunately bus drivers tend to have a wandering eye and and some of them can be pestering women. There are types that are decent and not overstepping boundaries, but some can be a right nuisance and you shouldn’t put up with it.
Is the company your son works for rather large or small? Do they have several depots? And are the routes they are running commercial or TfL?
You needs to:
Block this guy on social media, but not before asking him to stop asking messaging or asking for your number
Talk to your son to let him know what is going on
Make a complaint against the driver- your son and the driver work for different departments and it will not affect your son directly. Chances are he is not asking just for your number, he is asking for other women’s number too.
Or you can make a complaint against him without blocking him on SM as he will not know who has done it.
There are a plenty of leaflets circulating in the industry about harassment and he is blatantly disregarding them.

Five times a day! That’s way over the top.

I get why you haven’t said anything, to support and protect your son, but you need to protect yourself as well. Either block him, or send a ‘please can you not message me’ message, and you’d like future communication to be kept professional.