AM I IN THE RIGHT OR WRONG?

[Dadto31986]

Hi All

just looking to get some people take and opinions.

i am married to my wife and we have 3 kids. Everything is good generally. We have our ups and downs as i am sure most couples do - but these last few days we had a big argument over believe it or not Easter Eggs.

Our parents and extended family generally get the kids eggs for Easter. This year the way our schedule worked I couldn’t get to my mothers to get the kids eggs until today. However on Wednesday she had a last minute meeting very close to my work so she called and asked if I wanted her to drop them off. So I said if it’s not out your way and so ahead dropped them to me. I didn’t say anything to my wife I was going to give it as a little surprise on Sunday morning. Nothing more nothing less. My wife and I discussed that evening our Easter plans. I said I would get the eggs from my mum on Monday and didn’t disclose that she had already dropped them off to me. Anyway on the Saturday morning in conversation I said to her that I do have the eggs and so the kids will have them on the Sunday. From no where I was being called a liar and deceitful. In my eyes I was just going to give them a little surprise, her argument is I lied to her and should have told her I had them when we discussed it on the Wednesday night. I know it’s kind of petty but what’s peoples thoughts? Am I in the wrong or is there an over reaction??

My question is - why would it be funny to pretend you don't have the eggs? As surely that would be a wind up.

Its like playing on someone's feelings which I would hate.

You should just say it was a stupid joke, and you're sorry.

The fun of Easter anyway for kids is doing an Easter egg hunt.

You lied, you shout in your thread title, you are disparaging towards your wife. Yes of course you are in the wrong.

She needs to grow up. If the gender role was reversed you are aware the MN Divorce FC mob would say "Throw him back"

Like others I don't understand why you lied to your wife. I'd be annoyed about unnecessary lying, do you have a habit of telling lies?

Why would you like about that?

It's not a lovely surprise or a funny joke so it just seems weird and sneaky.

Have you given your wife reason to distrust you previously?

You lied.

Funnily enough people HATE being lied to

you are entirely in the wrong

I’m wondering if you lie a lot about little things (maybe you don’t even realise) but it obviously would unsettle and irritate her. And that’s why she reacted so strongly. Because it was yet another lie…

You lied. It makes you look like you’re hiding stuff.

I understand keeping it a secret from the children but why your wife?

Shes probably thinking that it you’ve lied about this what else have you lied about.

I don’t understand why you didn’t just tell her during the previous conversation. It wasn’t a surprise for her it was for your children. If my husband lied so easily about something so trivial it would make me wonder what else he was lying about.

She seems to have over reacted but most people would think you were being weird.

its such an odd lie to tell. To be honest k would be a bit puzzled by your behaviour - and think you being a bit of a prat. Immature maybe?

I suppose if it’s part of a bigger pattern of her being irritated by you doing things like this regularly she might have a bigger reaction?

do you often find yourself hilarious when others just give you polite / bemused smiles?

Men can be baffling. I'm desperate to understand why you lied about the eggs. Just why?

it was an odd thing to not tell her about but she way overreacted!

Yeah this would piss me off too. My ex used to lie about pointless things and then try and gaslight me about it. But he wasn’t very bright and just made himself look like a dick.

YABU.

Do you often lie?

Wierd.

You lied to “give your wife a little surprise on Sunday” but then you must have changed your mind about giving her a surprise because you told her on Saturday anyway.

Bizzare behaviour.

I suspect you do this a lot, lying, that is.

I think it's that you purposefully lied to her. If she'd mentioned going to your mum's on Monday, on Saturday, and you'd said oh I completely forgot to tell you she already dropped the eggs off, the not telling about the eggs would've been an oversight but you had an actual conversation about it earlier in the week where you deliberately lied to her. It's very odd.

Agree with everyone else. You lied and it was stupid. Her reaction DOES seem a bit ott, but I can think of a few reasons, off the top of my head, why she might react this way.

1 the plan for you to go to your kithers involved logistics and compromise (eg re social plans, childcare, other chores) and so you left her assuming all that for DAYS even though you knew it wasn't necessary. X1000 if she had had to give something up to accommodate this trip to your mother or take something extra on.

2 you lie regularly about silly things and/or big things and she's tired of it.

3 there's a complicated relationship with your mother and her ans this makes it more complicated - eg a conversation your wife had with your mother in which she didn't know about the eggs (but lots of other ideas) .

Why did you lie about such a silly thing?

I've got no idea why you wouldn't tell your wife that your mum had already dropped off the Easter eggs to you at your work.

It seems a really odd thing to do. Why would you keep up the fiction that you would collect the eggs from your mum on the Monday? The kids being able to have these eggs on Easter Sunday is hardly a fantastic surprise for your wife. I can see why she is pissed off as it's such an unnecessary lie/surprise.

I said I would get the eggs from my mum on Monday and didn’t disclose that she had already dropped them off to me.

Why? This is bizarre. Why lie about something so inconsequential? There must be some sort of back story here?