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Original poster

Age difference

8 replies

Lazy2024 · 19/04/2025 15:12

Hi
just need some advice. One guy is so intense and obsessively interested in me at work.I don’t want to proceed but how to end things as we don’t talk with each other and don’t work directly.
he is 10 years younger than me and in mid 30s and also I am from different culture

OP posts:
Mallor · 19/04/2025 15:13

How is he intense and obsessively interested if you don’t talk with each other?

Original poster
Lazy2024 · 19/04/2025 15:22

By his actions continuous eye contact without breaking and making so many efforts to show his interest

OP posts:
GhostHunterPlay · 19/04/2025 15:24

OK. I understand how he can be this way about you, even if you don't talk to each other.
Is he always there when you don't want him to be, such as in the works canteen, placed so he can stare at you?
Does he always seem to "get in your way"
on the corridor?
Does he make excuses to be near you?
Do you often feel him staring at you?
Don't forget, he doesn't have to talk to you to make you feel uncomfortable. He just needs to look at you, be at a certain place and at the same time.

BobbyBiscuits · 19/04/2025 15:27

Tell him via whatever channels he's communicating with you that you're not interested in him romantically and to only speak to you for work reasons.
If he continues then contact HR.
Nobody should be bombarding you with intense attempts at sexual relationships in the workplace. It doesn't matter if you don't work in the same building and have never spoken verbally.

Original poster
Lazy2024 · 19/04/2025 15:33

GhostHunterPlay · 19/04/2025 15:24

OK. I understand how he can be this way about you, even if you don't talk to each other.
Is he always there when you don't want him to be, such as in the works canteen, placed so he can stare at you?
Does he always seem to "get in your way"
on the corridor?
Does he make excuses to be near you?
Do you often feel him staring at you?
Don't forget, he doesn't have to talk to you to make you feel uncomfortable. He just needs to look at you, be at a certain place and at the same time.

Exactly watching the work I do and being in the same place and appearing front of me several times a day and continuously staring me and passing thirsty comments.

OP posts:
BlahBlahBittyBlah · 19/04/2025 15:37

It sounds like harassment to me. He’s obviously making you uncomfortable. If you’re not able to speak to him and ask him to stop it, I’d consider reporting him for inappropriate behaviour at work.

DoYouReally · 19/04/2025 15:40

Hard to tell ftom what you've posted so far.

What efforts is he making to show interest and what exactly are his thirty comments?

If the efforts and comments are making you uncomfortable go to HR but if you've only got prolonged eye contact you won't get far.

Mallor · 19/04/2025 15:42

Lazy2024 · 19/04/2025 15:22

By his actions continuous eye contact without breaking and making so many efforts to show his interest

Ah I understand, that sounds really awkward and unsettling. I agree that if you feel uncomfortable speaking to him directly (which would be understandable) I would speak to a manager and raise your concerns. It is inappropriate to make you feel like that

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