Joined Hinge last week after 5+ years of exceptionally happy celibacy.
My profile is incredibly fuckoffish - I don’t want to interact with anyone bigoted, homophobic, racist, misogynistic etc and I also want to weed out those with sectarian views (I’m in Ireland, it’s a thing…). One brave soul messaged me, we seemed to have a few things in common and arranged to meet up next week as we are both busy people.
But it’s just so tedious, being checked in on every bloody day. The “hi, how are you” or “how was your day?” from someone I know virtually nothing about. I would have preferred to meet up sooner as I would have been able to avoid several days of this inane back and forth.
Woke to another “how was your day” from late last night and just thought fuck this, it’s not for me. I don’t know this man, he doesn’t know me - why is he behaving like this? I realise he’s just following the pattern that seems to be expected in the online dating world but it is just so false. I would have been happy with very little contact between arranging to meet and the meeting itself. Maybe I should have said so, but by now I have the ick and there’s no going back.
Last time I was on the apps, I’m sure we just arranged to meet and there wasn’t this tedious preamble of forced conversation in the days between matching and meeting.
I’ve binned him off this morning (he just said “ok”) as I’m not interested in creating a fake online connection or in having to endure this until next week’s meeting - if there was something there, I probably wouldn’t be feeling like this. But the day after we agreed to meet, he started with the “how was your day?” banality. I did ask my male bestie whether he does this and he said it‘s a thing. So depressing. Back to happy appless life! Does feel like a weight off, not having to correspond with a pen pal…