Late middle aged (new) relationships

[mnmnddddd]

Everyone i know who has successfully settled down with a 2nd life-partner, post divorce, has done so in their 30s or 40s.

Everyone i know who's got divorced and empty-nested in their 50s, is single and settled in their own home which they love, with their own circle of friends who are important to them, and has a routine of book-club on Monday, yoga class on Tuesday, knitting circle on Wednesday, SCUBA club on Thursday, girls' (or boys') night out on Friday, there's Strictly on Saturday, and Sunday is for family BBQs. Because that's what being 50something is. Right?
And all the divorced 50something singletons I know basically want to be in a full time relationship, with happily ever after, but couldn't imagine giving up any of what they have.
And I'm probably guilty of all that.

The problem is, if we don't want to give up what we've got and the lives we've built, and neither does anyone else in our demographic, surely we're all doomed to die alone ... except for our 15 cats.

Discuss.

I did not want to remarry or meet a man. Far too busy and stressed with difficult ex, two children etc and a stressful job. Then I met him. Was never going to live with anyone never mind marry someone and yet here I am, married, brought a house and he is my soulmate - love is easy with him. Really easy.

I still have a fulfilling life etc

Your post is just right. There’s nothing to discuss really. If you have your routine and live in a bubble you’re only going to meet the few people who enter that bubble. Everything else requires some form of compromise or change or searching outside the bubble. Obviously dating websites allow you to do that. I was last online dating in my early 40s. How horrendous that was to navigate. God knows what it’s like 10 yrs on given how little men look after themselves. Or you could go younger?!

I will be 50 next year and I have two kids.
I am sadly coming to the conclusion that it's unlikely I'll meet anyone else.
I fancy men, but just not any of the ones who are available.
Most of the men over 50 on the apps are just ewww.
The only men I find attractive are those who are not single, because let's face it the decent guys are in relationships and marriages for a reason.

I divorced my husband when I was 60. It nearly killed me. I have tried hard to drag my life back together and nothing will ever induce me to commit to a serious relationship again. I’d like companionship again but can’t imagine ever being that vulnerable again.