Considering ending my marriage

[EeewDavid12]

I dont even know where to start. We have 2 DCs- aged 4 and 1. I’m thinking more and more about leaving my husband (together 11years) but I’m just petrified how I’d survive financially due to cost of housing. We currently split all bills 50/50. We’re in the south west, but without moving absolutely miles away to fairly unsavoury or inaccessible areas I couldn’t even rent a 3 bed. How do people do it? I have stable job but nowhere near a promotion, some savings but not much (mat leave wiped them out), I don’t think I’d get a mortgage for a property on my salary as the repayments would be too big.
life just seems more and more miserable, he isn’t abusive, we just aren’t compatable and have nothing in common anymore. Since the kids came along he’s just always grumpy and either in an “everything is shit” mood or just doesn’t care when I try to suggest activities we could do. I’ve just had enough and would rather be a stressed out single parent than living in such an unhappy marriage. Sorry for the long post. I needed to rant.

Have you talked to him about how you’re feeling?

@SmugglersHaunt weve spoken about how he’s always miserable and down and how he basically thinks life is crap now we are parents. I haven’t said I want to leave him.

Your post sounds very similar to my life. It’s soul destroying isn’t it.

if He says life is crap with kids, have you asked him what he wants? The years with kids under 5 are the hardest but if you can work together and get through, things can get much better. But you do both need to work at it. Doing the child care as a team and having marriage counselling if necessary.

This part of your life is TOUGH!!! Kids is tough on marriage and as you as individuals. People often poo poo how men deal with children but they can find it hard. Having been on the other side I would talk to him kindly but frankly about how this makes you feel and seek marriage counselling, making it clear it's making you so miserable you are thinking of leaving.