Am I unreasonable

[T122]

on Sunday me and my boyfriend had an argument. We both said things in the heat of the argument. He made comments on my past. He owes me a lot of money and in the argument he blocked me, I told him if he didn’t pay me the money back I’d take legal action to get my money back.

we had previously agreed to him going to the cafe to meet an old school friend. I later found out they went to a pub and he was buying her drinks.

i always told him not to rush to pay me the money back cos he had debts and I wanted him to pay them off so we could begin building a future together. I was angry to find out he had been out buying other girls drinks when he owes me money.

am I wrong for that?

How long have you fern with this loser and why on earth are you lending him money?

About a year and half. I was lending him it to help him out, never minded lending him out. But feels shit to know he’s going out buying girls drinks, when he owes me money.

he says it’s unfair of me to be like that, when i didn’t lend him the money that paid for the drinks but he used his own money.

First post nailed it. Throw this one back.

Would you feel differently if he was buying drinks for himself and/or a male friend?

I think this seems to be less about the money and more about trust issues with him drinking with other women and overstepping boundaries he set when meeting her.

Have you got an agreement in writing about the money you've loaned him?

You're being a bit daft lending him money to "build a future" - he ought to be actively working to sort himself out and showing you he can build a future with you. Where's his pride and grit?

Helping him out with what? Where’s his own money?

Honestly no decent man will EVER ask his gf of a year to lend him money to help him out.

You know he’s a wrongun so maybe you have to accept losing your money to learn a big lesson and to get rid of this scrounger

Yanbu, I would start that legal action now. Even if you have texts saying how much he owes you and him agreeing that counts as in writing.

If she is just an old school friend why was he buying her drinks? That's the type of thing guys do when they take someone on a date.
And yes I would be furious if he se isn't paying money back that he owes but is taking other women out to pubs.

He's a loser and you need some self respect asap.