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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Teenage DD friendship difficulties

1 reply

chewytalagi · 05/04/2025 19:26

15 year old DD likely autistic and since high school it's been one friendship drama after another. We are very close so she tells me everything but I find it incredibly draining and not sure I'm giving her the right advice.

I'm autistic and don't have much luck with friendships myself, as I've got older I don't suffer fools or people please anymore, so have hardly anyone left in my life bar a few long standing friends I see a couple of times a year. But I am mostly at peace with that, however DD is very sociable so wants to see friends a lot.

She tends to get very attached to one friend and this lasts for 6 months to a year until a drama inevitably occurs and then the cycle starts all over again with a new person. She is very good at making friends and reaching out, however the wheels seem to come off the more the friendship develops.

Last week a new friend let her down 30 mins before they were due to spend the evening together and cancelled. Turns out she had a better offer but lied about why she couldn't meet. This friend has form for doing this and I have advised DD to give this 'friend' a wide berth. It just eats away at her self esteem. But she seems to keep going back for more.

I know I am probably over-invested but she is my only child. Should I back off, leave her to work it all out herself? I don't know what to do. Constructive advice would be gratefully received. She has pretty fragile MH and this is not helping.

OP posts:
doodahdayy · 06/04/2025 04:14

Let her get on with it. Just be there if she needs you but don’t wade in.

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