Really struggling today

[ChersHandbag]

That’s just it really. I’m really at rock bottom with anxiety and fatigue.

I came out of an abusive marriage in 2022, only divorced last year. My ex totally left and so I am lone parent to two children. Now I’m waiting in an expensive rental for the opportunity to buy, but everything in our area is a bit out of my reach. I also need to get a new job (work f/t). These are very middle class problems, and I have a professional career and really a good buffer zone of money. But I am so, so tired. And so anxious.

I just have so many regrets. I regret my marriage extremely, it was so awful. I regret not fighting for more money in my divorce (I was too scared). I regret hugely the relationship I had on the rebound which was not especially warm or kind and into which I poured lots of energy.

i don’t have any advice but didn’t want to read and run. Try to focus on what you have achieved! You’re no longer in an abusive marriage and you’re finding ways to rebuild a happier healthy life for you and your children! If the version of you that felt awful in that marriage could see you! 💐

Anxiety is such a bad place to be in, what is your trigger?

Regrets will not do much for you, and I know you have probably been told that. You got freedom now. Two bundles of joy, I am sure. You will find that job and a good place your little family will be happy in. You will be able to make it your own, and feel free and more settled. You have come this far, and clearly held it together. That takes guts.

I remember being in your shoes ones and how I lost sight on the present because I felt I should have done more. But the freedom that came with leaving felt almost overwhelming.

You got this.

Congratulations on getting away from him, removing your children from an abusive relationship, and being financially independent from him.

Don’t be too afraid or proud to ask the people who love you for some extra support now and again.

You will be absolutely fine in time. We all have regrets and they all teach us something. Accept you regret those things, work out the lessons learned, chalk it all up to experience, let the bad feelings flow away, forgive yourself, and refocus on all the reasons you have to be thankful, and proud of how you’ve moved on.

💐

Thank you for these kind words.

This all sounds very fresh with only just getting divorced last year. It sounds like the dust is still settling. Give yourself some grace for being tired and anxious. Those are natural feelings! They don't take away from the very positive steps you have taken, they probably mean you need some time to heal and find your feet.

It may not feel like it right away as this is really quite new, but you have set the foundations for a much much happier future.

It may take some time to build your life up to where you want it, but you are a million miles ahead of where you were last year.

This is only the start. Keep making good decisions and believing in yourself. The longer you keep doing that, the better life will get. I bet you'll look back in 5 years and be so grateful to yourself for taking the steps you are taking today. There's no rush and you are doing brilliantly.