Need Marriage advice please

[De2023]

Hi,
I need as much advice as I can get.
i lied to me partner when we first got together 20 years ago about who i was with before him. I ended up telling him through counselling in 2018. I moved away for a week with the basis that he was to move out by time I got back but he was still there and didn’t want to leave.
long story short, we have stayed together but things are not great. We have been blessed with a beautiful child 2 years ago but our relationship is completely dead but he won’t say let’s spilt up cos we have worked hard to have our house, etc.
what do I do when he won’t work on us. It’s Mother’s Day today and he has even acknowledged it for me as well!!
thank you

If he won't say let's split up can you? Sounds like you're unhappy and life's too short for that.
Can you consider separating?

Why are you allowing him to decide? If you want to end your marriage, tell him that is what is going to happen.

Cos I would love if he would change. I’m afraid if I finish it I’ll be making a mistake. It’s just so hard

I have said it to him and he won’t go with it. It’s just so hard to know what is right to do. Yep, I am very unhappy but so afraid i would be making a mistake

so you slept with people before him and he’s unhappy about it, 20 years in? Your counselling was 7 years ago and it’s still bad? I know you say you hope he might change but what on earth would make you think that after 7 years and a child and he hasn’t already??

I don’t know anymore. I’m going to talk to him again tonight and see cos all I want is a little happy family. I just don’t know how I’ll do it on my own. I’m hoping that what I say today will wake him up to I am serious about us going or separate ways!!