Hi, I’m looking for advice as I’m feeling quite alone in this. I’ve been with my partner for 12 years. We’re not married but we own a house together. No kids. 3 pets who we both adore. My partner has become golf obsessed. This last week we were both off, so we had 9 days off. 7 of them he played golf. That’s ok in some ways because he has no reason not to, and we don’t have kids and he likes to do his own thing. He’s independent, as am I. The issue I have is that it does feel sometimes like our whole non work lives (we both have stressful jobs) revolve around his golf. In fact not sometimes but always. He does do stuff with me when we’re on holiday, but it feels like (perhaps unreasonably) he’s doing things with me so then he’s ‘free’ to play golf. I feel used, like a part of his life he nurtures a bit to maintain, before he does what he really wants to do ie play golf. I raised it this evening and he got very defensive, is now saying he’s going to stay at his mum’s for a few nights because I gaslight him, I can’t say anything without it being thrown back in my face and nothing I say is worth listening to. On some level I think he’s right in that I’ve had a go at him for now reasonable out of the blue. I’ve not really said anything before and I’ve sprung how I feel on him. He’s got angry. He’s now sleeping in the other room. In some ways I wish I was 12 months down the line, house sold, own place and my cats with me. It’s just hard thinking about the bit inbetween. I may be being unreasonable with what I’ve said but I’d hoped he’d recognise that it comes from a good place, essentially wanting more from him, more than his golf at least, but upset that the answer has been a hard no. In so many other respects he’s great. I’m just upset that my views count for not just nothing, but contempt. When one person gets to contempt there’s no way back right?