My partner of 9 years who I had plans to get married to cheated on me, lied and has now abandoned me. He’s been ignoring me for a month. I’m 15 weeks pregnant, I’m suffering with Hyperemesis in my pregnancy so I had to give up my career as I’m sick & I’m self employed. Everything was going well previously , partner promised to support us etc. He’s a high earner too.
Long story short, I found out he’s been on the dating app Feeld (maybe more), lied about his income (but he was happy to put 100% of my money into our joint pot when I go back to work) was hiding a lot of money for himself, booked a secret holiday to date other women and more. We had an an argument the day before i found out (as he was following random girls on IG again) that led to me staying at a hotel, to get away from him to protect my unborn baby. He went to his parents.
When I confronted him, he just came back to our flat with his dad, ignored me while I’m in tears, took his stuff, including the TV & air fryer, had his dad film me the entire time too like I’m a zoo animal. It was horrible. He’s also refused to put what was meant to be our joint budget into our shared account, which was meant to be for food and essentials. He’s literally whitholding money for food from me while I’m growing our child. He just told me to “claim benefits because he doesn’t need to help me”. I’ve also had to file for homelessness as we were renting a place, but I’m too sick to work and I don’t think he’ll pay the rent as he’s disappeared. I told his mum that I have no access to money for food too, and she said she’d speak to him but nothings happened.
It seems he’s happy knowing that I’m struggling, even though he hurt me?
He’s also blaming me for this whole thing too, because I raised my voice in an argument.
It’s been 4 weeks and he’s pretty much completely ignored me. Hasn’t asked about mine or the baby’s health. No conversation. No apology. No nothing. I had a scan the other day and he didn’t show up or ask how it went.
I’m just feeling really lost, blindsighted, betrayed and just like crap. We planned to get pregnant too, so I just don’t understand any of this. There were no signs of this behaviour before, me and my family are completely shocked. He promised to always be there for me and he really wanted to be a dad. It’s like he’s erased me from his life, after almost a decade.
I just don’t know what to do? I have contacted him but he’s ignored all of my messages so I’ve stopped now. Any advice or words of wisdom welcome.
I’m terrified of becoming a single mum. My mum was one, and I just wanted my child to grow up in a healthy house with two happy parents.
Thank you