Wife tells lies and then laughs it off - should I ask her why?

[Supertjam]

We are living with my parents whilst out house purchase completes. My parents have the space and are happy to have us here.

On Friday, my wife was cooking and told me there was no pasta in the pantry. She said something along the lines of, “there was 2 bags of pasta here yesterday, your parents must have hidden it from me.”

I know that wasn’t the case because we had pasta a week earlier & it had run out. The shop didn’t have the specific type that my wife likes so I hadn’t purchase any. Plus my parents don’t eat pasta / wheat.

I reminded her of this and she just laughed it off her comment. However, this is a pattern of behaviour where she says nasty things about people and when challenged she laughs it or denies she said anything or claims she has been misinterpreted. She’s made comments about colleagues, neighbours, her extended family, my family and even friends.

It’s hard to describe her behaviour but it’s just small, gossipy stuff you might hear in the playground at school.

Howevetr, I have been upset / annoyed at her comment. I haven’t really discussed it with her because I know it would cause a row, as she is sensitive if she is challenged about something.

A few years ago, she made a comment about a friend to a third party and her friend found out. She came to our house and asked my wife for an explanation, things became heated and my wife became hysterical and burst into tears, in front of our children.

i don’t know whether to push it and ask her why she felt the need to say this and start challenging her behaviour or just leave things be.

Yes, but not in a huge or challenging way. Just laugh and ask why she likes to stir up trouble. Don't let it fester but I think do get a handle on what's going on. She sounds as if she likes to stir maybe just from boredom? Not an attractive characteristic.

There might be a self-esteem issue here. However, I would perist in gently calling her out on it with make too much of a big deal of it.

Of course I would pull her up on it. She is living in your parents house and lying about them...you don't bite the hand that feeds you!
She sounds like a trouble maker.

You are perfectly entitled to calmly ask her why she does this. I would remind her that there have been consequences in the past and you don’t want to see her so upset and emotional like that when she is confronted.

it’s an unpleasant thing to do and it’s clearly hurt people in the past, she needs to stop.