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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feelings stuck and sad

1 reply

Purplemood · 23/03/2025 19:06

Hi just wondering if anyone can give me any words of advice in regards to dating as a single mum.
I split up with my child's father 2.5 years ago. His mum massively interfered with our relationship and eventually he just walked away. I never expected to be in this position and I'm still struggling with it to be honest.
Since we separated I have dated 3 men and reflecting it on it they all love bombed me and then went cold / distant wanting to see me very casually and leaving me feeling like I didn't know where I stand then it would just fizzle out or they ghosted me.
I feel like my confidence is on the floor and I know I'm not perfect and maybe I can come on too strong. I don't know.
im just wondering if it will ever get better. I really want to move on with my life and just be happy but it feels impossible. I'm mid 30's and really want another child but only in a committed relationship. This feels unlikely for me now.
I sometimes spend time with child and ex and enjoy it but the thought of us getting back together gives me the anxiety I had when we were together due to the immense pressure from MIL (she is Muslim, I am not) so some cultural differences maybe.
any advice welcome please.

OP posts:
Maitri108 · 23/03/2025 23:13

You don't sound ready to date.

It's your responsibility to look after yourself and you seem to be unable to spot dodgy men. You've had three relationships in a row with what sound like toxic men.

You're not coming across too strong, but you're being used. I would get some therapy and do the Freedom Programme. Work on your self esteem and be by yourself for a while.

As the Stones crooned, we can't always get what we want, so explore having a child without a partner. It will take the pressure off.

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