Relative and her victimhood mentality

[Sunsetreds]

I have a close relative "Lisa". She left an abusive marriage several years ago and has 1 child from the marriage. The husband was basically in it for a UK passport. He was from Turkey and started abusing her and basically trying to push her to leave as soon as soon as he got his UK passport.
Lisa eventually left, after living in denial for a long time and trying to convince herself that he loved really and was just suffering stress/depression /homesickness.
He turned out to be quite nasty and it was a relief to the whole family and friends when she gathered the courage to leave. This was about 7 years ago.
Lisa was morbidly obese at the time and he'd been very cruel and taunting her about her weight.
Fast forward 3 years after that, Lisa has shed her weight and looks great. Also has a wonderful partner, engaged since last year. Beautiful home together, job with great prospects. Child thriving. Everything to be thankful for.
So, I find her constant SM posts about her "narcissistic ex" to be tedious. It's every day. Everything she ever posts is about being a DV victim or narcissistic ex. Like she's made "bring a victim of DV" her whole entire reason of being. Her whole platform and all she wants to post about.
Can't imagine how the fiance feels, seeing the relentless posts about her ex and DV.
She seems obsessed with it.
I myself have also suffered DV but I just got up and left. I don't even talk about it unless asked, certainly don't post all over SM about it.
Should I say anything to Lisa? Maybe suggest counselling? Xx

If she hasn't asked for advice or help then YABU and perhaps you should turn off notifications from her if you have an issue with what she posts?

Unfollow/mute/block her

As someone who’s also gone through it I’m surprised you can’t understand the long term effects that can ripple out years later after the event or toxic relationship.

Sure she may have a victim mentality and not have the same thought processes you do well two sides to the coin there she may think you haven’t processed yours by burying it and moving on etc.
No way is the right way, it’s just what helps her/yourself.

Not having a go but I think if you say anything to her and in particular, recommending she does therapy when A you don’t know if she does or not and B coming from a place that isn’t genuinely empathetic is unlikely to go down well.

I can see your point. Maybe in her mind she's sharing for awareness or to support others, and doesn't realise it's become repetitive and boring. If she is sharing for therapeutic purposes SM is probably not the best place for it.

People do latch on to things and use them as a personality substitute- we all know at least one "autism mummy" who constantly co-opts their child's struggles as their identity, or a chronically ill person who only ever talks about their health issues. PPs are lying if they say they haven't encountered that.

I’m hearing one of your parents in your post op. My guess is someone downplayed emotional cruelty and your right to your feelings. Someone hurt you yet punished you for your response.