Withdrawing because I'm sick of being in 2nd place

[Muddypaws554]

To his dog.
When we met he had a dog and it was exactly the same. We had 2 years where he didn't have a dog after the other passed away. Now he's had another for a few months and we are back where we were.

Basically he has the dog glued to him 24/7. He can't stop telling me how much he loves him. I've started sitting on the other sofa. Leaving the room. Going to bed on my own and not bothering.. because the dog gets to sleep with him everynight. They wake me up when they come through to bed. The dog jumps on me to get onto the bed. He then spoons it and faces away from me.

We've not had sex once in 2 months. He doesn't gave a single moment dog free now. He's obsessed with him.

I am feeling low after a bad day at work yesterday. He laid down on the sofa and asked if I wanted a cuddle. I made it clear it wouldn't be comfortable once the dog leapt up. He wasn't bothered and just continued to watch tele and hug the dog..I went through to bed. At 1am they came through. He'd nodded off hugging the dog on the sofa. It took me over an hour to get back to sleep because or them both.

I've had enough. I treat the dog well..I like the dog. But I can't stand the way my partner is.

Wasn't there a TV program, It's me or the dog? (I might have made that up).

I'd be moving out.

It wasn't an animal for me, it was a bloody guitar!

Yuck, the smell alone would put me off. Throw this one (and his dog!!) back

End this. He is a spooning the dog in bed ?! My god, get out this is weird.

Is this new? As he actually said this week he watched a program about people who feel left out or jealous of their partners dog haha. I thought he'd been googling it.

I know they curl up together everynight. He tries to show me occasionally that the dogs not taking over. He will cuddle up to me. Then the dog jumps up after a few minutes and he will move it behind him. But I'm not being funny. I don't just want a cuddle. I want a sex life.

Good for you.

I'm off to work in hour so they can eachother back to sleep

No, I don't think so. A few years old...

I'm going to have to Google now.

So he's 'joking' about it, he's made his decision already.

In all seriousness, what do you see yourself doing? You can't play second fiddle to a dog, especially in bed!

Let me know your findings. He says he's watched something.

No It will end because of it. He won't change. I know from last time he gets obsessed with the dogs and they become the center of his world.

It's not really fair on the dog if there are no boundaries and it suddenly gets shoved away! Blimey 2007!

Good for you - end it. I couldn’t put up with this either 😩

I just tried to attach an image from the show.

Do you think that if you did leave that he'd be completely blindsided... 3 of you, all happy together... Where did this come from?! Is he not working?

I mean in the job sense, not the relationship sense.

It’s not actually the fact you’re jealous of the dog - it’s his obsessive behaviour. As for not having sex and sleeping all in the same bed, that’s Not ain’t to aspire to

Wow thats an old program. I know. The dogs actually well behaved. He's just been taught they come as a constant pair. He barely comes near me now because he's obsessed with my boyfriend. I've sat on the 2 seater this morning. He's on the 3 seater and the dogs laid on him. It won't ever change. I'll just be called jealous as he's started having more conversations with me saying he's worried ill get fed up of his dog.

Exactly. I dont get it. I am so frustrated. At what point is it acceptable to go sleep with someone else lol. That's how I'm starting to feel though. I feel rejected and unwanted.

Dogs in bed…. No no no
there need to be boundaries

Sadly I don’t see where this goes other than you heading off, or kicking him out etc

Personally I’d let it be known to him another guy is showing interest in you see how he reacts. X

Don't play games with him. Just leave. You deserve better.

My DH and I have rescues. One has very complex needs which meant, for a time, we had to have it in our bedroom as otherwise we couldn't get any sleep as it would just cry all night (it was honestly like having a newborn). Over time we built up its confidence and it went to sleeping on the landing. Now it sleeps downstairs.

Dogs in the bed - absolutely not, except in exceptional circumstances in which we've both agreed to it. You need a serious talk about boundaries and it needs to start with the bedroom. Try building up like we did, sleeping on the bedroom floor, then outside the door, then downstairs to its own sleeping space. You need to work as a team though if you're going to salvage your marriage.

Didn't you post about this the other week? I'm sure I remember this story pretty much detail for detail

I was coming to say exactly this! What's changed since you last posted, OP?

I remember a posting about this before.

What has he said when you have spoken to him about it ?

The only thing you can do is to set aside some time for a serious conversation and get him to agree to set some boundaries for the dog. Set a timeframe to train the dog. I’m not sure this would be very easy, but it’s either this or leave