Met my partner 5 years ago. Fell in love. He's gorgeous, funny, family love him, we into all the same things....
Post Covid, his business starts to fail bringing financial issues which obviously I just supported him through, picking up his half of the share of bills etc. didn't think much of it.
We then 2 years later fall pregnant with our first child.
His finances are slipping more and more. Its getting bad by this point. I ended up using my maternity leave savings to cover his share of bills/ rent etc (i run own business)
I begin finding out he has a lot of debt that u hasn't known about... I'm so so stressed by it but still standing strong by his side as he always telling me "it's under control" and I stupidly believed it...
We fall pregnant with second child who is now 6 months old.
Since the birth of second child things have spiraled more. His debtors finding me and threatening legal action, his failure to contribute financially at all to the kids and family life. His dishonesty around debts, the stress this situation is bringing into the home. The reluctance and procrastination in getting a stable job.
I hit breaking point.
I told him he needs to go away and fix this and come back when he can be the man he needs to be for me and our children.
He has moved out and is being respectful of this space I have requested whilst he sorts his shit out.
He knows there's absolutely no chance of reconciliation without finding a stable job and creating and executing a plan to pay off all the debt.
My question is.... can people really change?
Would you have done the same?
I feel guilty for braking up the family but equally I couldn't carry on the way it was going.
(We are not married and no joint finances/ accounts)