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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Time to give up on my friend?

2 replies

wishitwasfridayeveryday · 07/03/2025 13:45

So.. I've been trying really hard to get back in touch with an old school friend who moved to another part of the UK a couple of years ago. Up until when she moved, we'd been really close and had basically grown up together.
She moved quite suddenly and without any notice, she messaged me afterwards with her new address.... Sadly I deleted the message by accident when clearing out my inbox. Meanwhile she disappeared of all social media and the mobile number I had for her was no longer in use.
I knew one of her relatives so I contacted them on social media to ask about my friend... Relative replied to say they hadn't heard from my friend either and can only presume friend doesn't want to speak to anyone.
I've checked local media and newspapers online for her area, nothing about her having died or being involved in anything that would make the news.
It's very unlike my friend to be out of contact for so long... How else can I try to find her... As I say, I deleted the message with her new address, she's changed mobile number and disappeared off all social media. Doesn't come up in google searches either, I've tried that. Wasn't in work for several years before moving. No mutual friends.
Would the police be worth contacting? Or would they only help if there's reason to believe she's come to some harm? Obviously I wouldn't want to waste their time if it's just a case of my friend not wanting to keep in touch. But it's very unlike her.

OP posts:
Girlmom35 · 07/03/2025 15:10

I'm sorry to hear about losing your friend like that. You must be very worried.
However, you've done all you can. If she doesn't want to be found, it's best to let go.
Does she have any other family who are looking for her? If anyone should be contacting the police, it should be them. Then again, people are allowed to disappear and start over.

wizzywig · 07/03/2025 15:12

So you know if she left due to dv/ something that meant she had to move immediately? She did give only you (it seems) her new details.

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