Texting patterns

[BlueisBeautiful]

So I've met someone and we exchanged numbers and have been texting since last weekend about when to meet up and general chatting. He has told me he has been single for a long time, he lives fairly local to me and seems keen to have a date.

I've noticed that every day since we met last weekend he texts in the morning, mid to late morning, whilst he is at work and then once in the early afternoon sometimes. I'm not a big fan of texting, I'm too old and actually so is he. I know he works a 9 to 5 office job so I find it a bit odd that he doesn't engage with me in the evenings.

For example today, he asked where we should go and where to meet. At 9.30 this morning. I did think why doesn't he ask me after work. Anyhow I responded with some dates and places that worked for me and then have heard nothing back. That was lunchtime. This is on Whatsapp and he was last online after reading my message at lunchtime. The reason I'm a little befuddled is that in my mind, in the type of job he is in, although he does have some freedom, he has to meet certain deadlines and why doesn't he wait until the evening. I've read posts on other forums where women seem to find out that men who never contact them in the evenings are usually very much attached.

Maybe I'm being overly cautious. Does anyone else find it odd? He tells me he's single and available pretty much any night I'd like to meet with him. But my spidey senses are a-tingling....

I think you will find he is a big drinker. My ex was in the pub from 4pm till closing, which I didn't know as I only saw him weekends. Also betting on sports and season ticket holder so away a lot. Not compatible with me so that was that. Just ring him, I agree texting is for kids and the retired. I don't have time for that, Saturday. 3 pm at Wether spoons, great see you there. Any done.n

Maybe he texts during the day when he needs a break? I don't think when he texts is an issue - I mean it's a minor point isn't it?
I think you are overthinking it all at this stage.

This is a big debate in OLD but honestly, I wouldn't read to much into someone's texting pattern at first. I'd look for if he's planning the date and how that works out for you both, then you can say, "hey I'm not a big texter love it for making plans but no need to check in on me all day long", or maybe you do love it, then you tell them that... it's okay to say what you want and don't want, but you can't read much into a stranger by their messaging style, unless of course they disappear or bombard, but something in-between is okay. Look up Sabrina Zohar on Instagram, she talks a lot about how texting isn't that important, it's more about how someone shows up IRL, and if they do! Once you are past the first few dates you will find your rhythm, and you do not have to like texting. I hate it because I work on a screen all day and don't want to be talking to a man on one all day long too, but I always say that and then they seem kind of relieved!!!

Quick update and will be back with more but just to let you all know I met with him Sunday afternoon for a coffee and a bite to eat and he told me without me asking why he's not in contact much in the evenings. He has quite a big caring responsibility in addition to long hours in the office and usually gets up at 5 every morning and is in bed as early as possible.

Won't say too much more about the details in case it's too outing, but we've hit it off really well and we both decided we'd like to see each other again. Given both our responsibilities it may be in another two weeks time, hopefully sooner, but for now, I feel more content that he's not avoiding getting in touch in the evenings. What he has on his plate once he gets home, no wonder he has more "free" time at work!! Taking it slow and will keep an eye on things.

Good update OP. Hope it goes well for you!

Happy update.

I was just going to say that I almost never text people in the evenings. Firstly, I have a demanding job and come the end of the day I'm scooped out with very little social energy left. Secondly, I get up very early to run before work so I'm often in bed by 9.

It's nothing sinister, dishonest or covert

Glad to see your update and wish you the best of luck. Was going to add my vote to the day time texting is reasonable crowd too, also due to being knackered in the evenings and having less energy to compose messages!