I know this isn’t going to sound very good. I have been on and off with someone for 9years Iv loved him very much. He’s cheated quite a few times years ago . Iv always never forgiven him and its never been a clean slate so there was a lot of not trusting and fights. I got pregnant in 2023 and he left when I was 5 months pregnant because of him going out every weekend and me arguing that he was going out all the time and taking drugs . He totally abandoned me while the fights between us got out of hand felt like I was begging him to stay after him letting me down. I went through the pregnancy on my own . When the baby was born and all my emotions were everywhere I allowed him to see our daughter . She’s now one years old and he’s been a great dad. He always shows up for her and pays child support to me. It’s been really tough navigating motherhood singly and he’s stopped over helped a couple of times. He spends a lot of time with me and the baby but he has never ever made it apparent he misses us . He slept with someone 3 weeks after the baby was born and I just feel absolutely disgusted that while I was getting over birth, couldn’t walk still, risked my life bringing her into this world , he was getting on top of someone else. I feel like that was the most vulnerable time of my life. He says he doesn’t regret it and he deserves to be happy and move on. She was a weeks fling apparently that he stopped because he wanted to focus on being a dad .He’s never tried to be with me romantically since DD born and iv very much still been in love with him the whole time. We help each other other out a lot and spend a lot of time with the baby etc or Text and everyone wants to salvage a family don’t they? Am I over reacting because we (wernt together)?
he’s still saying we can’t be together , and he will always be there for me and the baby because of the baby . Iv asked if he cares if I move on and he said ‘no. I just feel like it’s because I’m always here . Always have to contact. And men don’t tend to realise anything until it is too late! I do want to be a family together and for the most part we do get on and can be great together but I just feel he sees me in a light I can’t change. Please don’t judge me I know everyone’s dynamics of a relationship are different but I believe if we went to therapy or worked on our stuff we would work . He said he wouldn’t be jealous if I was with someone else ? I asked if he still was attracted to me and he said yes but not romantically . I just don’t get men. Do they not love woman and just see everything with no emotions.
like he’s prepared to lose me I feel like I can’t hold on to him anymore . I don’t know if he would even care if I limited contact between us .he knows how much I love him . It’s awful feeling like someone wouldn’t miss you . I just got myself in a situation of begging and pleading the other day out of nowhere , after a year of us parenting and now I feel depleted . It’s very easy for people to say ‘move on’ . But iv loved this man for a long time .