Cheater

[Amyali]

Im so lost. My husband of 18 years cheated on me last summer, he paid a sex worker. Apparently it was his first time ever he cheated. I found out due to getting STI. Anyways because I am a loser, I forgave him and 6 months later he says he doesn’t want to be with me. He loves me but we are not on the same page. He wants to take a break and see how he feels. So I took his keys and said take a long break and never return. Why am I so stupid. Why do I love a person who has disrespected me time and time again. Why am I like this. I hate myself. I’m such an embarrassment.

I think @StrawberryDream24 is very likely to have hit the nail on the head. It wasn't an escort who gave him those STI's. He's made up that story because what's the first question anyone asks when they find out that their partner has cheated? They ask, 'who?'. If he doesn't want you to know who, (for reasons known only to him) then the easiest workaround is to invent an anonymous sex worker. It's also suspicious that he seemed to want a trial separation. Very rarely do men do this unless they have someone lined-up in the background.

OP am just cheering you on and sending strength.
Also, props to *Channellingsophistication *
What an inspiration:)

Awh thank you all for your replies and inspirational words. It’s been few days now I haven’t heard from him which is on the up. I love me, I can do better than him and I need to be kind to myself. I will look after my children and I will look after me. I’m strong. I just don’t know how anyone can treat anyone that badly. Honestly it baffles me. I always always choose kindness. But I feel like me being empathetic got used and abused and spat out. Why I put up with the disrespect il never know however for me the disrespect is so loud for me now, last few days I feel like I hate him.

He can go do better than me but for me, I’m putting me first, time to heal, grow and just be alone and see what life is like with my girls. Also a build a career, I’m 34 years. I can do this. Anyone at any age can do this.

Good luck op.
Look for hidden surprises each day. A new person being kind/empathetic. A new activity or friend. Listen to music from your childhood or a time not associated to him.

All the best op.

Today he messaged me asking if il do some errands for him. Stuff that I would usually do. I did not respond. What an absolute joke.

Can you block. ?

Wow. Cheeky bastard.

No I have children with him so sometimes still need to communicate.

I know his seething inside that his not getting any responses from me. Unless it’s to do with my children he can do 1

I think you're being really smart in not replying.
You're stronger than you think.
I'm glad you're speaking more positively about yourself, you deserve better than this man.

I am honestly shocked at myself for being this strong. Just feel like a mug when I think about forgiving him last year about the cheating. Only for him to treat me badly again and then leave.

Should’ve kicked his sorry arse out 🤣