Bored in marriage

[ForSharpMintZebra]

My husband works away a lot and I feel that as a consequence we are drifting apart. I used to feel close to him, but I feel we are now physically and emotionally becoming distant. It is even things like he is watching news on different channels and having opposing political views to me and I get disgusted listening to his very strong views. We are not close physically, there is no cuddles etc. We don’t argue either. I have spoken to husband and he thinks there is no problem, he never thinks of divorce and feels comfortable and happy with me. He doesn’t seem to hear my concerns.

A few weeks ago I was shown a lot attention by another man, right in front of my husband and he didn’t have a problem with it so I fully enjoyed it. It’s definitely made my head turn and I crave that kind of attention from him, but it’s just not going to happen. I find myself thinking and planning of divorce but I feel like it’s just because I am bored in our marriage? Financially we are comfortable and having a divorce would just change everything.

Hi ForSharpMintZebra,
Sounds like we’re going through the same situation. What struck me most is when you said I crave for him to be like that - I cried at this point! Me too, told him I no longer want to be with him.

What was his reaction when you said you don’t want to be with him?

I am still trying to work things with my husband, I have suggested we would go for a weekend trip together. I tell him that I miss him and I crave a connection with him. He doesn’t feel this way at all, says he is lucky to have me, he is completely oblivious to any problems and it’s making me wonder why I feel like this when there isn’t a big problem- there is no violence, cheating (that I’m aware of anyways) etc. for me it’s just a lack of connection and it’s because he is away a lot and tired when he is back. I want to feel like I have a partner.

A divorce really worries me as well, and I know things would get heated. I’m planning ways to increase my earnings to be able to cope on my own financially.

I could have written this post. I completely understand how you feel, my husband is to oblivious but I don’t know how much longer I can do this!

It’s not the first time I have said it. He was upset. Divorce is not what I wanted for us. Sad times.

That’s the trouble they are oblivious. Sorry to hear you are going through the same.

If he’s working away a lot and not interested in you then he’s probably seeing someone else. He didn’t even care that you might be too (with the man showing you attention).

I hear you!!
I totally crave that kind of attention too!
my husband and I are similar, except he doesn’t work away (unfortunately…)
He’s home every day, moaning, complaining and most of the time totally ignoring me. It’s just so dull!!
financially we are comfortable too, and getting divorced would mess that up!
IDK what to do!
we also have a 12 year old and it’s best for DC if we stay together but I do crave affection and warmth and he’s so dull and cold! 😰

Same!! 😣