Stories of hope after emotionally abusive relationships

[Bleak7]

I sense that I am about to be dumped from my second emotionally abusive relationship. The rest of my life is falling apart and I feel completely lost.
Can anyone share their stories of hope after emotional abuse? Be that single or with a future partner. I'm worried I'll never be loved again. I ruminate constantly over my part in these break-ups. All of my friends who are dating are having a nightmare and I have little in the way of family. I could do with a big hug right now.

Have a hug 💐

I am in a healthy and supportive loving relationship now but I needed to be on my own for over five years to get to the place I needed to be in in order for that to happen. You can do it. Therapy can help but also reading things like Baggage Reclaim to make sure you know the red flags.

You don't need stories, you need therapy to unpick why you are choosing abusive partners.

Then you can work on how to make better choices on the future.

Dont wait, take action yourself, take control of your life

Take back your control, do the work regarding your choosing unsuitable partners. Raise your standards, take no shit. Be single. Find out who you are.

Love yourself. Until you do, you can't expect anyone else to. That's my recipe for a happy, contented life after many years of abuse from my now exH.

I've been in abusive relationships and my life has fallen apart a number of times. I don't have any family either. It might be that you're finding yourself in abusive relationships because of your lack of family, which was the case for me.

I decided not to have any more relationships and instead chose to face the pain of not being loved. It wasn't half as bad as I was expecting it to be and nothing like the pain of those relationships.

Find a new hobby, throw yourself into something and don't waste any more of your precious life thinking about abusive men. It's nice to be loved but not essential. Get a cat.

Sending a hug. This sounds like a blessing in disguise though really if you feel he is emotionally abusive? I understand that feeling of worrying about never being loved again but I ultimately came to the sad conclusion (and this might sound harsh) that you can’t lose what you don’t have in the first place: if there is emotional abuse it’s not real love is it? I understand the rumination too but that did eventually go for me.

I found the Freedom Programme so so helpful and I really recommend it, not just for learning to spot red flags early on in future but also in how to spot green flags and also I formed strong bonds with the other women on the course who all lived locally and we were able to support each other.

I left my abusive ex husband over a decade ago now and have brought up my son alone, it’s been very challenging and I haven’t felt able to date again for some complex reasons (some definitely to do with trust issues after that relationship I think), but I do feel confident that if I did I would not fall into the same trap again. And ultimately I know I am much better out of that relationship than trapped in it whether I am single or not.

I have love in my life, just not romantic love, for me I am very fortunate to have a supportive and loving family, I’m sorry you don’t have that to rely on but you do have good friends from the sound of it. Try to redefine love, and see it from a different perspective, I think that has helped me a bit. I do wish there were more resources out there for people trying to rebuild their lives following domestic abuse, it’s not easy, but it is worth doing.