Sister's wedding

[tinaabbot]

My sister stopped talking to me a number of years ago, just stopped. She will blank me in public even in front of people.

She's getting married at the start of the summer. Would you attend considering the likelihood that she will just blank me and my partner on the day?

Thank you for all the replies, good to get other viewpoints.

I do believe they want me to decline but don't want to be the one to make the wave iykwim.

I have tried to reach out and been ignored.
Others in the family brought it up initially and the discussion was shut down.
They have always been a bit odd, socially, but it's always been accepted by family and they can generally do no wrong.

Seeing your last update, I would in that case decline.

I'd be polite but distant, saying thanks for the invite, but unfortunately you are away and won't be able to make it.

And you could even book a night away somewhere if you want to/fancy it. To completely avoid any drama.

Happened to me a couple of years ago with my brothers wedding. They did not even acknowledge me three days prior to their wedding so myself nor my son attended. I couldnt go and be ignored and I dont care what anyone says about them 'speaking to me on the day' if you want someone to celebrate with you you acknowledge their presence. They have never. I do not regret not going I would have felt sick and anxious all day and then be told I was making a drama and making things about me. Horrible feeling but I had to save my mental health.

Sorry you went through similar @Genuineweddingone and thanks for sharing.

Thanks again everyone for your comments, it's been helpful to remind me this is a crazy situation enabled by the people around them, it's not in any way normal behaviour. @ComtesseDeSpair my DP did nothing to start all this, or fan the flames, but him helping out my family with something and getting the same behaviour from my sibling was really the final straw for me. That is why he is to the forefront of my mind.

I'll be the bad guy, but I'm not going to attend. On reflection there was only a relationship there when he wanted something from me, so it's not a lot to loose. The rest of the family will be outraged that I won't just go and pretend everything is fine, but so be it, I'm realising I was never a priority.

Given that she chooses to blank you so openly I would not even bother to respond to the invite.

She doesn’t want you to be there any more than you want to be there.