Hi all,
I have an almost 4yo girl who gets super engrossed in what she is doing and like many kids forgets to go to the toilet until it's too late.
Over the weekend we were at a local park where she went down a wet slide so had a damp bum for a little while however her trousers dried off while she was playing apart from between her legs. I spotted this and asked if she'd wet herself at the same time. At the time she said no so I took her word for it and let her continue playing thinking that it was from the slide as the water may have puddled a bit as she went down. However she then went on a zip line with my husband who also saw the wet patch and instantly assumed she'd wet herself so told her off and said that we were leaving the park. Cue an upset little girl.
Once we were clear of the play park area and making our way out of the gate my husband then unloaded a barrage of "consequences" (his words not mine) on her. This included telling her he was embarrassed of her (no one else saw she'd wet) calling her pissy** knickers and telling her she won't be allowed to come on our summer holiday with us unless she stops pissing herself. At the time I told him to go away and he walked off leaving me to get our girl home on her bike on my own.
Later in the day I told him he was wrong to talk to her the way he did but he showed no remorse. I tried to facilitate talks between him and our girl but she wasn't ready to engage with him and he didn't pursue it with her to try and make amends.
Every inch of my being is telling me I need to get her away from him and protect her. But I have less than £100 to my name and no family I can go and stay with. I feel stuck but she deserves so much better, it's my job to show her how she deserves to be treated and I feel like I'm failing her.
Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do next?