DP and I have been married 12 years and have a 7yo child. I am the sole worker. We share childcare and housework about equally. Multiple issues here which I'd like advice on:
I have a serious mental health condition (don't want to name it but let's just say it's not a one pill thing but a handful including not just prescription drugs but controlled substances for life). Partner has been broadly supportive except when I need to have a short (or long) conversation about things with her about it. I understand DP needs to cope and has her own mental health issues too, and that much of this should be dealt with by a therapist (missing on the NHS but willing to go private). But is it too much to ask if I can speak 5 minutes daily (as I can't to a therapist) about what's going on in my mind everyday (not all of which is dark)?
I make enough for a simple unambitious life for all of us. We own a home. But job contracts are medium term and people with my condition are anyway not known to stick to employment for too long (and the past has borne this out in my case) and the likelihood that I may someday be unemployed for life is statistically quite high. I would like DP to take up a job (even on a separate account keeping the money for herself) though this conversation is too stressful for her. For the record the house is mostly out of her savings-she was quite a big earner before she decided to quit (Long before DC was born).
If she continues to not hake a job I would like her to take more household responsibility. The cooking cleaning etc. I can handle. But mental labor issues such as "which energy supplier" "pipe's burst, which plumber to call, let's look at reviews" or even "how to organise speech therapy for daughter" are extremely anxiogenic for me, and despite my requests in all such situations to do it together, it's me who has to pick up the ball, there is little engagement from her.
What general advice can people give me?