I am 15 weeks pregnant with my first and my partner has just ended our relationship (essentially because the arguing had become very intense and I have been impossible/behaved unacceptably through pregnancy)
There is a complex background with two sides of course. I am distraught and shocked but trying to take part responsibility in the situation. I do not want to separate and it is of course not what I imagined when we planned our family.
He has said he will be there “every step of the way” and wants to be on a co parenting team (if I choose to keep the pregnancy, which I will).
My initial reaction is that if he isn’t even able to have a proper conversation about whether we can make our relationship work then how could we possibly get to a stage where we can “co parent”, which presumably requires good communication, trust etc.
I feel I do not want to co parent who has done this to me. but my inner gut instinct is of course focused on what is best for my future child, and I want to properly consider all options.
my question is - what might it actually look like to co parent through pregnancy, birth and with a new born? Can we do this from a place of such animosity? What will I even need from him through pregnancy (I imagine he has in mind that he’ll come to all of the appointments, but that feels kind of superficial and what I actually think I’ll need is help around the house etc).
another question is - what might it look like if I can’t manage seeing him again through pregnancy? How would he then become involved?
I just don’t have any precedent for this kind of situation.
thank you for any thoughts.