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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Weird one...

1 reply

ggggrace · 29/01/2025 19:46

This is weird... apologies in advance.

I have a 4 year old and I'm currently 20 weeks pregnant. So as you know with kids you can't just "do the deed" as and when, most the time there is some planning or preparation lol.

Long story short me and my partner have always been quite adventurous. He has hundreds of pictures & videos of me / us.

I've done my hair and a bit of makeup so he knows what's going down later on which he's acknowledged etc. If it's worth adding we have sex often. I'd say around 5 times a week.

But he goes through phases where as soon as our 4 year old is in bed he will shower because he's not long back from work, and watch our photos / videos in the shower before coming out to me. It isn't a massive problem but sometimes I hate just sitting here waiting when he could be spending actual time with me? I just don't understand it. Like if I'm not in the mood or if I'm not home fine go for it but why when he knows he's coming out to me?

He doesn't watch porn or anything. I know that for a fact also as we share a Google account and he's happy leaving his phone around etc and the odd time I've checked what apps he was on he wasn't even using safari so...

I'm not sure what I'm after I'm just wondering if that's normal or anyone been in a similar situation?

OP posts:
NotthinglikeaBondGirl · 29/01/2025 19:59

My DH will suggest that he's 'up for it' (eg sex) so I have a shower, get all dressed up in the sexy gear that he likes...then when we get down to it somehow it doesn't happen (my DH is 70, the start of dementia & ED issues, but takes little blue pills that do the trick). DH will apologise and I always say (genuinely) doesn't matter, never any pressure to have sex, a lot of kisses & cuddles is fine with me as it's all about being intimate & sex isn't everything. Got to confess that sometimes I 'sort myself out' while he watches though. 😉

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