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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Very confused feelings

2 replies

dinosaurusmum675 · 28/01/2025 11:07

I recently came to find out my husband has been cheating on me and we have parted ways. I found out who the girl was and had asked an old childhood friend if they had heard anything as he lived in the same area as her. He was so kind and supportive to me checking in the odd day to see how I was doing. I've never ever thought of my old friend in this way but I don't know if I was so low and finally having just someone to ask if I was ok or not it's lead my brain to thinking I have feelings for him. Since this I have removed him off everything as he is married and I certainly don't want to tarnish anything he's got. Anyone else been in this situation with your brain playing tricks on you. Any advice is greatly received. Everyday I think about him but I can't help but think it was the kindness I received as I never got any of my husband.

OP posts:
DaisyChain505 · 28/01/2025 11:19

He was someone who showed you kindness when you weren’t being treated very nicely by your significant other it’s bound to muddle your mind when you’re feeling so low and mistreated.

You’ve done the right thing by new perusing anything.

Work on your self esteem and healing your heart and then think about getting back out into the dating scene.

You don’t need to accept the first man who shows you kindness. There are plenty of them out there and you deserve to be with the right person for you.

BloodyGarry · 28/01/2025 11:26

Yes op, I used to think of my brain being my worst enemy if I could not control it.

it’s good you’ve nailed it on the head so early on and realised what attracted you in this old friend in the first place.

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