Man approached me on street - WIBU to be suspicious?

[Luckysaintd]

I’m single, late twenties, and have always been shy. It’s mostly as I’m insecure about my appearance, and it doesn’t help that I live in London where there are so many stunning women. I’ve become more self conscious since living here as I feel way below average. I’m in shape and know how to do my makeup but doubt it counts for much here. I think the prettiest women from my small hometown would be deemed ‘average’ here as standards are so high. Due to this, if an attractive guy happens to go out of his way to show interest in me I’m extremely paranoid it’s a prank or scam.

Like others I’m not a huge fan of dating apps, but truthfully it’s the most feasible way I can get a chance to go on a date. I’m less suspicious if I get asked out online because maybe it’s my profile or interests that have swayed a guy. Also it’s ‘easier’ for a guy to ask someone out on an app, they already know you’re single and swiped for them.

Anyway sorry for ramble, finally moving on… When walking home yesterday evening, I walked past a stranger who was talking on the phone. He was handsome, similar age and seemed quite posh. Surely I’m not the only nosey one who wonders what a strangers life is like, especially when you overhear their conversation. 😂

I didn’t think he would have noticed me, but after walking past him I had just turned my head to look back. He had turned his head to look back at the same time - was so embarrassed he ‘caught’ me staring. He then asked for my number, and I was so confused and suspicious.
The guy then presumed I didn’t speak English well because I awkwardly froze so tried asking in broken Spanish (big Latin community in this area).I just awkwardly said sorry I have to go then quickly walked off.
It’s only when reflecting, I thought what if he genuinely was interested but my paranoia just ruined it. A few friends of mine have had ‘meet cutes’ but it makes more sense for them as they’re really attractive.

I had a slightly similar experience a few months ago when a guy had stopped me to ask for directions, then admitted he wanted an excuse to speak to me and commented on my appearance. Again, I was too suspicious as he looked ‘normal’ and better looking than me, so why would he be interested. I made an excuse about having to rush off.

Was I sensible to be wary? Both men seemed ‘safe’ otherwise - obviously you can’t be 100% sure, but then the same could be said about men you meet online.

Man looked at me and then asked for my number. That's quite odd imo.
If you really think you are "below average" looking (???) then of course you would be right to be suspicious because based entirely on you walking past he has decided to ask for your number.

Just rude.

No need for that . Hope I never come across you IRL

Whether he was genuine we'll never know. What is startlingly obvious though is that you have huge self esteem issues and you should try and address that.

Fortunately not every man is shallow enough to only go for the "stunning" women (thank goodness otherwise I'd have never got married!) Some are intimidated by them. Personality is important, as is the way you hold yourself, the way you dress etc. Confidence can be a lot more appealing than a pretty face, and let's be honest, lots of women look totally different when they've removed all the make up and contouring.

Rude ? Really?
That certainly wasn't my intention!

If you don't mind me saying, I think if you've taken offense to the extent you would avoid me for life because of a wee comment like that, then, I think it's a bit of an over reaction.

Besides, just think, as this is an anonymous forum, I might be your neighbour or somebody you interact with IRL on a regular basis! I'm sure that would be very galling for you.

I've seen people on reddit giving guy's advice to ask for women's numbers when they see someone in real life that they are interested in. It could be that, but it's hard to know.

Some words and expressions are just icky for people like 'moving forward' or 'moist' i thought it was funny she hates meet cute as I thought it was a clever and sweet descriptor when i first heard it.

‘There is a Lady sweet and kind,
Was never face so pleased my mind;
I did but see her passing by,
And yet I’ll love her till I die.

Maybe it's me but years back I think it was quite common to see someone on the train or walking past and get chatting then asked out ?
I'm sure you are attractive op , and we all fancy different people thankfully or no one would get with anyone !

@BobbyBiscuits yeah agreed it’s not wise to guess someone’s nationality or background in London, I’ve still had it happen to me quite a few times. It’s a bit more understanding if it’s an area where there’s a large community of XYZ group, and you coincidentally happen to look like that group. He spoke in English first, probably only tried spanish as I looked so confused.

@mybelovedghostandme Yeah interesting how some pp think it’s completely strange but I still know of people in real life who dated someone who caught their eye on the tube or street. It’s less weird if there’s more of an icebreaker first though

& Yeah of course, not everyone’s beautiful will be the same as another persons!
I didn’t think my opinion that a big city like London has higher standards would be so controversial though.
I’d seen on social media people saying ‘she’s a New York 6, but a solid 9 in Ohio’ or something of that variation. I think there was even a similar quote from the Office. There was general consensus that a New York 10 (or any other big city) would be more attractive than a 10 in a smaller poorer town.

& I don’t reduce people to numbers, it’s just the first example that popped in my head where people would agree there’s generally higher standards in big cities.

Tbh I think you shouldn’t worry about any of these men and instead concentrate on working on your self esteem.

Haha yeah, I mean when you put it this way it does sound very odd! 😂

Think I was just trying to delude myself into thinking he happened to have a thing for below average women. I don’t want to go back on the apps so will dream about an alternate reality where a handsome guy with good intentions just cold approaches me and we live happily ever after😅

Of course decent men do that!