(Sorry a little long and a bit explicit)
I met this guy 5 years ago, on a dating app, he happened to live nearby and one thing led to another, we made out and it felt passionate but when it came to sex he was limp and I tried everything all night but nothing, he said he had master-bated before seeing me and that’s why, I felt a bit embarrassed by it all but he seemed fine and wanted to see me again, he didn’t he blocked me on the dating app.
3 weeks went by and I was still on the dating app and he unblocked me and said he wanted to see me again and I thought why? As you blocked me and made me feel it was my fault it didn’t go to plan and that I must of been unattractive to him as that’s how I felt, he said he was embarrassed and yes I understand some men have issues from time to time, so I gave him another chance, we got intimate again and I did oral he was erect but went limp when he was trying to enter me, he refused to have sex but wanted to pleasure me which was great, he remained flaccid and said it took him a while to get it up, he wanted to leave says he had work early and yep he blocked me again.
Out of curiosity I checked his Facebook and noticed a bunch of men who were gay/bi following him, I contacted one of these men and asked did he know him well, he said no but he did want to meet up with him, but it never occurred, I know this shouldn’t make me think he’s bi/gay but something was niggling me with this guy, either that or he found me unattractive.
i sent him a message on Facebook messenger asking if he was okay, he replied he was working away and couldn’t see me, i was a bit gutted as i liked him regardless of his erection issue, I thought maybe he had performance anxiety, he acted straight etc so I just shrugged it off, that was until he contacted me 6 months later saying he was back in the area and wanted to see me, he asked did I hade any sex toys, he specified dildo I said I did and why he said would I peg him and I was a bit taken back as never did that before, I asked if he had been pegged before he said he had, I was unsure, he came to my home and was allover me and told me please could I peg him I caved in I felt guilty somehow that he couldn’t get erect with me so I did and I didn’t know exactly what I was doing but he seemed to by loving it, he even sucked the dildo and it kind of made me feel a bit off with him as my feeling was that maybe he was secretly bi/gay, I asked him he denied it said he was into kinky dirty sex which I thought okay this guy had a different way of getting off, I know some men like their prostrate played with and it gives them great orgasms, but he didn’t even get hard or came from what I saw, he just liked the penetration up there, I think he sensed I wasn’t all into it to be honest and didn’t turn me on, but wanted to pleasure him, he blocked me on Facebook as soon as he left my home. I was just a mess I felt like I did something wrong and I couldn’t contact him. i really felt used and disgusting to be honest I thought if I pleased him he would of liked me and would of wanted to see me again ridiculous I know, I guess I wanted to redeem myself to him that I could get him erect and that we could have sex. Guess my ego took a hit and I felt undesirable to him especially blocking me after every interaction with him.
few months went by and I tried a different dating app instead of the one he had been on to avoid him, as I was swiping I noticed he was on this dating app as well but I read his bio anonymously he wanted meet-ups with trans, cross dressers, dommes to be pegged as loves it bigger the better he had in his bio, that he would want to meet up with bi couples and be forced bi, I’m not saying he’s bi/gay still but made me think of the experiences i had with him especially not getting erect with me, I also found him on another dating app just wanting fun with bi couples and he put that he was questioning his sexuality, I know this is none off my business but for him being nasty to me
with him living near me I also heard he thought I was very ugly looking due to not being able to have sex with me, I found this out much later on after the last time I was with him, he also tried to get my attention at times, but in a negative way trying to provoke me, I’ve heard a few people near where I live calling him some not so nice names stating he’s gay, but he seems straight and I don’t know whether he may probably thought I was ugly and I’m trying to feel better somehow that the reason he couldn’t get erect with me is because he’s secretly bi/gay, my confidence and self esteem hit rock bottom due to this, has anyone experienced this kind of situation before was I a cover or just involved with someone confused in his sexuality? A couple of years later out of the blue he contacts me on Facebook, wanted to see me again even said he loved me,(ehhh???) but I felt he said that to me as I had a sneaky suspicion he wanted me to peg him again, I blocked him, I know it’s absolutely nuts isn’t it.